Aphorisms Galore!

Submissions

These aphorisms have been submitted by users but are not (yet) included in the official collection.

tiny.ag/ot5grulc  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

They say that unless you're the lead dog, the view never changes. Then again, if you're a dog you probably like that view.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Success and Failure and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/80dphrmd  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

The high road has too many potholes.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Wisdom and Ignorance and Happiness and Misery

tiny.ag/umylytbn  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

It's the end of days somewhere.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Food and Drink and Happiness and Misery

tiny.ag/wubxakn2  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

Given a choice between two evils, that's already three.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Wisdom and Ignorance and Happiness and Misery

tiny.ag/ecs7f0tm  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

For a while I thought I was bisexual, but only because I tend to get 'bi-' and 'semi-' mixed up.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Love and Hate and Happiness and Misery

tiny.ag/zmoay8yu  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

If her eyes don't sparkle, her gun will.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Men and Women and War and Peace

tiny.ag/6hyo5blj  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

The heart never lies. It asserts alternative facts.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Happiness and Misery and Law and Politics

tiny.ag/cwpxkoit  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

Sometimes I'm the windshield. Sometimes I'm the bug. But I'll never be a griper. As long as I'm not the windshield wiper.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Happiness and Misery and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/bafszvtd  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

Never fish for compliments. Lob dynamite in the water.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Success and Failure and Happiness and Misery

tiny.ag/zc5ldqn1  ·  submitted 2020 by Banatech

It often only takes a little thing to make a big difference!

Unknown

tiny.ag/uxp03akl  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

There's a famous saying: 'If 99 percent was good enough, gravity wouldn't work for 14 minutes every day.'

I did the calculation, and it's actually 14 minutes and 24 seconds.

Which can only mean that, for the person who wrote that saying, 97.2 percent was good enough.

The Covert Comic, in Success and Failure and Science and Religion

tiny.ag/kbxgklhw  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

When there's rioting in the streets, use the sidewalk.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Happiness and Misery and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/bcqhubw6  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

If this is the steering committee, how do I get on the emergency brake committee?

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Law and Politics and Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/265wytm4  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

Not only does history repeat itself, it increasingly forgets where it put its keys.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King

tiny.ag/dz0hgaqi  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

Reason, too, can dance. It just always dances the robot.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Science and Religion and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/hvvq2tmw  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

A thesaurus is a dictionary on drugs.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Art and Literature and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/i9cltgv4  ·  submitted 2020 by nickmichael

The good seaman is known in bad weather.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Happiness and Misery

tiny.ag/5pguhnsr  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

Carpe diem dulcis: Seize a nice day!

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Happiness and Misery and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/u0ltwf9r  ·  submitted 2020

An aphorism is what strikes you with its truth. Your own truths, however, are what comfort you when you strike others.

montorrahman

tiny.ag/tzkpaucb  ·  submitted 2020 by JAKGalore

Director's cut? Let's hope it's a major artery.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Art and Literature and Altruism and Cynicism