Front Page
Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.
Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:
tiny.ag/mjjtqyix · submitted 1997
An excuse is the mark of a moral coward.
tiny.ag/xkpfj82n · submitted 1997
Religion has done love a great service by making it a sin.
tiny.ag/ev3fc9xo · submitted 1997
Life is like a sewer -- what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.
Tom Lehrer, (from the album An Evening Wasted), in Life and Death
tiny.ag/ndewfsya · submitted 1997
The great question -- which I have not been able to answer -- is, "What does a woman want?"
tiny.ag/pxnbu4ey · submitted 1997
A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke.
tiny.ag/czhkruer · submitted 1997
Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.
tiny.ag/g9nfhw0y · submitted 1997
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
tiny.ag/nvdb2cfz · submitted 1997
Burning desire is the eternal flame.
tiny.ag/jwhevbgo · submitted 1997
My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.
tiny.ag/yefighwf · submitted 1999
Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
tiny.ag/r3davdhl · submitted 1997
In war, there is no substitute for victory.
tiny.ag/ct4xj6gg · submitted 1997
As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality.
tiny.ag/i5ba47dl · submitted 1997
It gets late early out there.
Yogi Berra, (on Yankee Stadium in the fall), in Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/fg9hhljz · submitted 1997
Two things I cannot understand: myself and others.
tiny.ag/zhi7upjz · submitted 1997
I would sooner fail than not be among the greatest.
tiny.ag/odq1svy5 · submitted 1997
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
tiny.ag/1jtdasvn · submitted 1997
Enlighten the people generally, and tyranny and oppressions of body and mind will vanish like evil spirits at the dawn of day.
tiny.ag/f7dpm5bc · submitted 1997
The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible.
tiny.ag/vmqykh2c · submitted 1997
The Lord gave us farmers two strong hands so we could grab as much as we could with both of them.
Joseph Heller, Catch-22, in Work and Recreation