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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.
Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:
tiny.ag/aoh5h6tb · submitted 1999
Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.
P. J. O'Rourke, All the Trouble in the World, in Altruism and Cynicism and Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/ikcjtldg · submitted 1997
A celebrity is a person who is known for his well-knownness.
tiny.ag/fwsozshx · submitted 1997
If you have a bowl of apples and you eat the best ones first, then you have only the best ones left.
tiny.ag/uvpjrb6x · submitted 1997
Desperation is like stealing from the mafia: you stand a good chance of attracting the wrong attention.
tiny.ag/i5ba47dl · submitted 1997
It gets late early out there.
Yogi Berra, (on Yankee Stadium in the fall), in Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/ynhvcg3k · submitted 1997
Oh, my friend, it's not what they take away from you that counts. It's what you do with what you have left.
tiny.ag/qn3ryz0y · submitted 1998
Freedom is not the right to live as we please, but the right to find how we ought to live in order to fulfill our potential.
tiny.ag/xachd7wx · submitted 1997
Whenever anyone says anything he is indulging in theories.
Alfred Korzybski, in Science and Religion and Wisdom and Ignorance
tiny.ag/odq1svy5 · submitted 1997
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
tiny.ag/t9m3smqg · submitted 1997
Women make love for love, men make love for lust.
Derrick Harge, in Love and Hate and Men and Women
tiny.ag/ndewfsya · submitted 1997
The great question -- which I have not been able to answer -- is, "What does a woman want?"
tiny.ag/nxwvhtlg · submitted 1997
Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.
tiny.ag/gu6tloek · submitted 1997
An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought.
Simon Cameron, in Altruism and Cynicism and Law and Politics
tiny.ag/hoklinq4 · submitted 1997
Middle age is youth without levity. And old age without decay.
tiny.ag/ooxlc4p0 · submitted 1997
Boring people are a reflection of boring people.
tiny.ag/kiehwrll · submitted 1997
We would often be sorry if our wishes were gratified.
tiny.ag/f7dpm5bc · submitted 1997
The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible.
tiny.ag/m6lj8yot · submitted 1997
Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions -- it only guarantees equality of opportunity.
tiny.ag/da1k6tun · submitted 1999 by Stephen
All these nervous breakdowns are driving me crazy.
tiny.ag/o7yghtxb · submitted 1999
Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two equals four. If that is granted, all else follows.
George Orwell, 1984, in Happiness and Misery