Aphorisms Galore!

Unknown

Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist

tiny.ag/ohvcxj98  ·  submitted 1997

Imbesi's Law with Freeman's Extension: In order for something to become clean, something else must become dirty; but you can get everything dirty without getting anything clean.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/1kbmhsw6  ·  submitted 1997

In politics people work hard to get a job and do little after they get it.

Unknown, (from Politicians and Other Scoundrels by Ferdinand Lundberg), in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/ipnqtb0n  ·  submitted 1997

If the effort that went in research on the female bosom had gone into our space program, we would now be running hot dog stands on the moon.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/exb7lihg  ·  submitted 1997

I've had one child. My husband wants to have another. I'd like to watch <EM>him</EM> have another.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/5edntuvq  ·  submitted 1997

If I can be of any help, you're in worse trouble than I thought.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/6jbweh3g  ·  submitted 1999 by John Cannizzaro

If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/fsy6lb1v  ·  submitted 1997

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/stfdm53a  ·  submitted 1997

If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/aqhc8mvh  ·  submitted 1999 by Glenn Troester

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/ugvde1cx  ·  submitted 1997

If bankers can count, how come they have eight windows and only four tellers?

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/d6tftb8q  ·  submitted 1997

If everyone would sweep in front of their own door, the whole world would be clean.

Unknown, (Middle Eastern proverb), in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/eanvvuth  ·  submitted 1997

If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/piw4y7md  ·  submitted 1997

If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/rh0iiyqp  ·  submitted 1997

If only I could be respected without having to be respectable.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/gjpds4m8  ·  submitted 1997

If only I could get that wonderful feeling of accomplishment without having to accomplish anything.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/26gdqtzf  ·  submitted 1997

If you don't believe in something, you'll fall for anything.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/o7ofzkdq  ·  submitted 1997

If you can read this, thank a teacher.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/hsipkpnw  ·  submitted 1997

If you can't learn to do it well, learn to enjoy doing it badly.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/vhuaqm1e  ·  submitted 1997

If you do what you've always done, you'll be what you've always been.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/mwma270i  ·  submitted 1997

If you believe everything you read, you'd better not read.

Unknown, (Japanese proverb), in Wisdom and Ignorance