Vice and Virtue
161 aphorisms · 5 comments
Aphorisms in This Category
1–20 (162)
tiny.ag/jgcbbn8p · submitted 1997
Revenge is sleeping with your enemy's wife. Sweet revenge is the realization that she's a lousy lay.
tiny.ag/kqsn5x9k · submitted 1997
Resisting temptation is easier when you think you'll probably get another chance later on.
tiny.ag/0arre1jp · submitted 1997
People who have no faults are terrible; there is no way of taking advantage of them.
tiny.ag/nsh95i8e · submitted 1997
People who claim they don't let little things bother them have never slept in a room with a single mosquito.
tiny.ag/vdvrew4w · submitted 1997
Pardo's First Postulate: Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.
tiny.ag/ogrqyeb7 · submitted 1997
Let your heart guide you. It whispers, so listen closely.
tiny.ag/nswjrmi0 · submitted 1997
Lead me not into temptation. I can find it myself.
tiny.ag/qyfvan9d · submitted 1997
The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.
tiny.ag/mltkwzme · submitted 1997
Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
tiny.ag/wpd94fsg · submitted 1997
The superfluous is very necessary.
tiny.ag/v7xs8s9o · submitted 1997
It is one of the superstitions of the human mind to have imagined that virginity could be a virtue.
tiny.ag/zrxpvvz6 · submitted 1997
All men are equal; it is not birth, but virtue alone, that makes the difference.
tiny.ag/4izcdfw7 · submitted 1997
I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television.
tiny.ag/8v5ai4cz · submitted 1997
These days, the wages of sin depend on what kind of deal you make with the devil.
tiny.ag/j8lj2pgz · submitted 1997
Virtue is its own reward. There's a pleasure in doing good which sufficiently pays itself.
tiny.ag/q2py4esl · submitted 1997
Let us so live that when we come to die, even the undertaker will be sorry.
Mark Twain, in Life and Death and Vice and Virtue
tiny.ag/mbwozhf6 · submitted 1997
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.
tiny.ag/iufy8ewr · submitted 1999
I should not talk so much about myself were there anybody else whom I knew as well.
Henry David Thoreau, Walden, in Vice and Virtue
tiny.ag/xuteqz61 · submitted 1997
Always do right -- this will gratify some and astonish the rest.
tiny.ag/dtrgibi2 · submitted 1997
When I'm good, I'm very good. But when I'm bad I'm better.
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