Unknown

It's better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you're stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

We trained hard, but it seemed that everytime we were beginning to form up into teams, we would be reorganized. I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganizing; and a wonderful method it can be for creating the illusion of progress while producing confusion, inefficiency and demoralization.

Unknown, (sometimes incorrectly attributed to Petronius Arbiter), in Work and Recreation

Give a man a fish and he'll ask for a lemon. Teach a man to fish and he'll leave work early on Friday.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

Always remember your weapons system was made by the lowest bidder

Unknown, in War and Peace

You're a genius if you fly a kite during a thunderstorm, and discover that lightning is electricity -- but you're an idiot if you fly a kite during a thunderstorm, and discover that lightning can kill you.

Unknown, (from Mad Magazine), in Success and Failure

You should emulate your heroes, but don't carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You may only have two of the three choices: (1) Enjoy your job. (2)Work within the law. (3)Make lots of money.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

You draw nothing out of the bank of life except what you deposit in it.

Unknown, in Life and Death

You cannot produce a baby in one month by impregnating nine women.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You cannot achieve the impossible without attempting the absurd.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You can't carve your way to success without cutting remarks.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You can tell a lot about a person by looking at what kind of people are his friends and children.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

You are only young once... but you can be immature your whole life.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Wisdom and Ignorance

No one gets too old to learn a new way of being stupid.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Not everyone born in a stable thinks himself a horse.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Nostalgia is the realization that things weren't as unbearable as they seemed at the time.

Unknown, in Happiness and Misery

Non-Reciprocal Laws of Expectations: Negative expectations yield negative results. Positive expectations yield negative results.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid all together.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

Never make anything simple and efficient when a way can be found to make it complex and wonderful.

Unknown, in Success and Failure