Aphorisms Galore!

Life and Death

196 aphorisms  ·  11 comments

Aphorisms in This Category

tiny.ag/bleirdyt  ·  submitted 1997

Caution: breathing may be hazardous to your health.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/uys04zyz  ·  submitted 1997

Be an optimist -- at least until they start moving animals in pairs to Cape Kennedy.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/lewynsak  ·  submitted 1997

Always remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/hwk0yobb  ·  submitted 1997

All I ask of life is a constant and exaggerated sense of my own importance.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/odq1svy5  ·  submitted 1997

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

Phyllis Diller, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/xiwdsjg7  ·  submitted 1997

Hard reality has a way of cramping your style.

Daniel Dennett, in Life and Death and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/hoklinq4  ·  submitted 1997

Middle age is youth without levity. And old age without decay.

Daniel Defoe, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/9djxhqx6  ·  submitted 1997

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Earl Wilson, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death

tiny.ag/q2py4esl  ·  submitted 1997

Let us so live that when we come to die, even the undertaker will be sorry.

Mark Twain, in Life and Death and Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/maz6ijau  ·  submitted 1997

The Mysterious Stranger (paperback)

Life is but a dream, a grotesque and foolish dream.

Mark Twain, The Mysterious Stranger, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/8vqphwcy  ·  submitted 1998 by Mark van Essen

Mankind terminated, man what a break.

Mark van Essen, (from a lyric written for Bruce Springsteen), in Life and Death

tiny.ag/ymq69cki  ·  submitted 1997

God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.

Voltaire, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/obxpwig2  ·  submitted 1997

Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.

Karl Wallenda, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/i9e7qkvx  ·  submitted 1997

Without the threat of death there's no reason to live at all.

Marilyn Manson, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/9exdprka  ·  submitted 1997

I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today.

William Allen White, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/ilv3oim9  ·  submitted 1997

Life is an unbroken succession of false situations.

Thornton Wilder, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/8tw9d5gh  ·  submitted 1999 by E. Lechner

Either those curtains go or I do.

Oscar Wilde, (last words), in Life and Death

tiny.ag/hurfcg6j  ·  submitted 1997

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.

Hector Berlioz, in Life and Death and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/yvxqb7s2  ·  submitted 1999

It is the deed that teaches, not the name we give it. Murder and capital punishment are not the opposites that cancel one another, but similars that breed the same kind.

George Bernard, in Law and Politics and Life and Death

tiny.ag/fmvyhi8i  ·  submitted 1997

The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, and the second half by our children.

Clarence Darrow, in Life and Death