Aphorisms Galore!

Altruism and Cynicism

173 aphorisms  ·  15 comments

Aphorisms in This Category

tiny.ag/mgrteolp  ·  submitted 2011 by peter

Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

Robert J. Hanlon, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/u5uejalg  ·  submitted 1999

Never give a sucker an even break and never smarten up a chump.

W. C. Fields, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/pyitdvns  ·  submitted 1997

I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

W. C. Fields, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/kvgolwyi  ·  submitted 1998

The danger today is not so much that machines will learn to think and feel but that men will cease to do so.

Ferry, in Altruism and Cynicism and Science and Religion

tiny.ag/vkemi9qo  ·  submitted 1997

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.

W. C. Fields, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/uapy9tbq  ·  submitted 1997

A man never stands as tall as when he kneels to help a child.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/td1vfiu9  ·  submitted 1997

Cynics regard everybody as equally corrupt... Idealists regard everybody as equally corrupt, except themselves.

Robert Anton Wilson, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/gu6tloek  ·  submitted 1997

An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought.

Simon Cameron, in Altruism and Cynicism and Law and Politics

tiny.ag/lgolcdhe  ·  submitted 1997

Getting caught is the mother of invention.

Robert Byrne, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/pbhm4rie  ·  submitted 1997

Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them.

Samuel Butler, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/eh4xjmzt  ·  submitted 1997

Love thy neighbor as thyself, but choose your neighborhood.

Louise Beal, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/58hbs9pq  ·  submitted 1997

It's not true that nice guys finish last. Nice guys are winners before the game even starts.

Addison Walker, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/amzxlbug  ·  submitted 1997

All humans are hypocrites; the biggest hypocrite of all is the one who claims to detest hypocrisy.

Peter Wastholm, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/k8lcsqdw  ·  submitted 1997

Calvin and Hobbes (paperback)

Heck, what's a little extortion among friends?

Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/jsphv1u4  ·  submitted 1999

A cynic is one who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.

Oscar Wilde, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/9djxhqx6  ·  submitted 1997

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Earl Wilson, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death

tiny.ag/knyvxbon  ·  submitted 1997

Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong.

Oscar Wilde, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/0fxuodhb  ·  submitted 1997

The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.

Oscar Wilde, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/vwaksnik  ·  submitted 1997

The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.

Oscar Wilde, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/cjkab7en  ·  submitted 1997

I can resist everything except temptation.

Oscar Wilde, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue