Altruism and Cynicism

Politeness: The most acceptable hypocrisy.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

The covers of this book are too far apart.

Ambrose Bierce, in Altruism and Cynicism

No good deed goes unpunished.

Clare Boothe Luce, in Altruism and Cynicism

Grub first, then ethics.

Bertolt Brecht, in Altruism and Cynicism

The simplest act of surrealism is to walk out into the street, gun in hand, and shoot at random.

André Breton, in Altruism and Cynicism

I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it.

Ashleigh Brilliant, Brilliant Thoughts (copyright info: www.ashleighbrilliant.com), in Altruism and Cynicism and Law and Politics

My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.

Ashleigh Brilliant, Brilliant Thoughts (copyright info: www.ashleighbrilliant.com), in Altruism and Cynicism

Please don't lie to me, unless you're absolutely sure I'll never find out the truth.

Ashleigh Brilliant, Brilliant Thoughts (copyright info: www.ashleighbrilliant.com), in Altruism and Cynicism

A book may be compared to the life of your neighbor. If it be good, it cannot last too long; if bad, you cannot get rid of it too early.

H. Brooke, in Altruism and Cynicism

Egotism is the anesthetic given by a kindly nature to relieve the pain of being a damned fool.

Bellamy Brooks, in Altruism and Cynicism

Black, white, brown, yellow or even red, we piss with our pants down, and go naked to bed.

Mark van Essen, in Altruism and Cynicism

I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?

Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism

Heck, what's a little extortion among friends?

Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism

All humans are hypocrites; the biggest hypocrite of all is the one who claims to detest hypocrisy.

Peter Wastholm, in Altruism and Cynicism

It's not true that nice guys finish last. Nice guys are winners before the game even starts.

Addison Walker, in Altruism and Cynicism

I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: "O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous." And God granted it.

Voltaire, in Altruism and Cynicism

A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.

Gore Vidal, in Altruism and Cynicism

Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

Robert J. Hanlon, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue

Good breeding consists of concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.

Mark Twain, in Altruism and Cynicism

Few things are harder to put up with than a good example.

Mark Twain, in Altruism and Cynicism