Aphorisms Galore!

Unknown

Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist

tiny.ag/4asrjxv3  ·  submitted 1997

I'm prepared for all emergencies but totally unprepared for everyday life.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/v0yeshan  ·  submitted 1997

I'm not afraid of work... I can even sleep beside it.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/lhewzazm  ·  submitted 1997

I'd rather be rich than stupid.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wealth and Poverty

tiny.ag/f2qlymio  ·  submitted 1997

I'd like to meet the man who invented sex and see what he's working on now.

Unknown, in Love and Hate and Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/epdarexm  ·  submitted 1999 by Jim Mueller

I wish I were what I was when I wanted to be what I am now.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/qksor8sl  ·  submitted 1997

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/fpgp1ubk  ·  submitted 1997

I am so evil that heaven won't take me and hell is afraid I'll take over.

Unknown, (T-shirt), in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/bleirdyt  ·  submitted 1997

Caution: breathing may be hazardous to your health.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/p7q95xlg  ·  submitted 1997

Hypocrisy is the vaseline of social intercourse.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/zdywajhx  ·  submitted 1997

Children in the front seat cause accidents, accidents in the back seat cause children.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/ygktzxcq  ·  submitted 1997

Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/nz2qcagl  ·  submitted 1997

Cheer up! Things are getting worse at a slower rate.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/qhswaupg  ·  submitted 1999 by Glenn Troester

Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/aqk8szqi  ·  submitted 1997

Change is good, but dollars are better.

Unknown, in Wealth and Poverty

tiny.ag/zmis8rln  ·  submitted 1997

Bradley's Bromide: If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/odgzoipj  ·  submitted 1997

Boob's Law: You always find something in the last place you look.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/tcqireyb  ·  submitted 1997

Boren's Laws: (1) When in charge, ponder. (2) When in trouble, delegate. (3) When in doubt, mumble.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/ls0zmykb  ·  submitted 1997 by Mark Dawson

However hot the water is, the fire still goes out.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/dm6wz1hm  ·  submitted 1997

By doing just a little every day, you can gradually let the task completely overwhelm you.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/yfwenbfh  ·  submitted 1997

Capitalism is the unequal distribution of wealth -- communism is the equal distribution of poverty.

Unknown, in Law and Politics