Unknown

Many a wife thinks her husband is the world's greatest lover. But she can never catch him at it.

Unknown, in Love and Hate

Isn't it strange? The same people who laugh at gypsy fortune-tellers take economists seriously.

Unknown, in Science and Religion

If everyone would sweep in front of their own door, the whole world would be clean.

Unknown, (Middle Eastern proverb), in Vice and Virtue

Insisting on perfect safety is for people who don't have the balls to live in the real world.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Insanity: a perfectly rational adjustment to the insane world.

Unknown, in Health and Disease

In politics people work hard to get a job and do little after they get it.

Unknown, (from Politicians and Other Scoundrels by Ferdinand Lundberg), in Law and Politics

Imbesi's Law with Freeman's Extension: In order for something to become clean, something else must become dirty; but you can get everything dirty without getting anything clean.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

If you're here, you're alive.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Wisdom and Ignorance

If you wish you be like someone else, you waste the person you are.

Unknown, in Happiness and Misery

If you were arrested for kindness, would there be enough evidence to convict you?

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue

If you treat a person as he is, he will remain as he is. If you treat him for what he could be, he will become what he could be.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue

If you see a turtle on a fence post, he has had some help.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you -- but if you really make them think they'll hate you.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

If you love your job, you will never have to work another day in your life.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

If you don't have time to do it right you must have time to do it over.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

If people talk negatively about you, live so that no one will believe them.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue

If only I could get that wonderful feeling of accomplishment without having to accomplish anything.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

If only I could be respected without having to be respectable.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue

If the effort that went in research on the female bosom had gone into our space program, we would now be running hot dog stands on the moon.

Unknown, in Men and Women