Unknown
Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist
61–80 (422)
tiny.ag/xnqzybth · submitted 1997
Johnson's First Law: When any mechanical contrivance fails, it will do so at the most inconvenient possible time.
tiny.ag/vykjqus7 · submitted 1997
Join the Army: travel to exotic distant lands, meet exciting, unusual people and kill them.
Unknown, in War and Peace
tiny.ag/0raepug8 · submitted 1997
Jones' Law: The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
tiny.ag/6vqkumld · submitted 1997
Just because your doctor has a name for your condition doesn't mean he knows what it is.
tiny.ag/b5lrmegw · submitted 1997
Katz' Law: Man and nations will act rationally when all other possibilities have been exhausted.
Unknown, in War and Peace
tiny.ag/rjjl9rkn · submitted 1997
Kinky is using a feather, perverted is using the whole chicken.
tiny.ag/jaktd8ze · submitted 1997
Laugh at your problems; everybody else does.
tiny.ag/acorhvan · submitted 1997
Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects.
tiny.ag/pcn2zosg · submitted 1997
Law of Probability Dispersal: Whatever it is that hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
tiny.ag/nswjrmi0 · submitted 1997
Lead me not into temptation. I can find it myself.
tiny.ag/slupay0r · submitted 1997
Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.
tiny.ag/ogrqyeb7 · submitted 1997
Let your heart guide you. It whispers, so listen closely.
tiny.ag/g6oi3hzo · submitted 1997
We trained hard, but it seemed that everytime we were beginning to form up into teams, we would be reorganized. I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganizing; and a wonderful method it can be for creating the illusion of progress while producing confusion, inefficiency and demoralization.
Unknown, (sometimes incorrectly attributed to Petronius Arbiter), in Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/bzeqsrni · submitted 1997
Wise men make proverbs; fools repeat them.
tiny.ag/mfa7pfik · submitted 1998 by Dave Supulski
You are only young once... but you can be immature your whole life.
tiny.ag/f65xdmkd · submitted 1997
You are not what you think you are, you are not what they think you are, but you could be what you think they think you are.
tiny.ag/vtwqjzpa · submitted 1997
Work is accomplished by those employees who have not reached their level of incompetence.
Unknown, (probably a misquote of Peter's Principle), in Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/muxgqopb · submitted 1997
Wonder is the beginning of wisdom.
Unknown, (Greek proverb), in Wisdom and Ignorance
tiny.ag/tcrvsd4o · submitted 1997
Women first want to find out what is in your wallet, and second what is in your pants.
Unknown, in Men and Women
tiny.ag/o4tugiae · submitted 1997
While money can't buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.
61–80 (422)