Submissions

Never fish for compliments. Lob dynamite in the water.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Success and Failure and Happiness and Misery

It often only takes a little thing to make a big difference!

Unknown

There's a famous saying: 'If 99 percent was good enough, gravity wouldn't work for 14 minutes every day.'

I did the calculation, and it's actually 14 minutes and 24 seconds.

Which can only mean that, for the person who wrote that saying, 97.2 percent was good enough.

The Covert Comic, in Success and Failure and Science and Religion

When there's rioting in the streets, use the sidewalk.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Happiness and Misery and Wisdom and Ignorance

If this is the steering committee, how do I get on the emergency brake committee?

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Law and Politics and Altruism and Cynicism

Not only does history repeat itself, it increasingly forgets where it put its keys.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King

Reason, too, can dance. It just always dances the robot.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Science and Religion and Wisdom and Ignorance

A thesaurus is a dictionary on drugs.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Art and Literature and Wisdom and Ignorance

The good seaman is known in bad weather.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Happiness and Misery

Carpe diem dulcis: Seize a nice day!

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Happiness and Misery and Wisdom and Ignorance

An aphorism is what strikes you with its truth. Your own truths, however, are what comfort you when you strike others.

montorrahman

Director's cut? Let's hope it's a major artery.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Art and Literature and Altruism and Cynicism

In my experience, 'stop, drop and roll' works for way more situations than just being on fire.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Wisdom and Ignorance and Work and Recreation

There are plenty of seas in the fish.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Love and Hate and Happiness and Misery

The whimper is louder than the bang.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Life and Death and Law and Politics

You don't drink to drown your sorrows, you drink to give them mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.

The Covert Comic, in Happiness and Misery and Food and Drink

There are fewer things too strange to happen, than things too strange not to.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Wisdom and Ignorance and Law and Politics

I filled out a survey at work. The first question was: 'Functional manager? _________________'

I wrote 'Rarely if ever.'

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Work and Recreation and Altruism and Cynicism

A tiger can't eat you if you hide in a lion's stomach.

The Covert Comic, a.k.a. John Alejandro King, in Life and Death and Wisdom and Ignorance

Writers are the pearl divers of the human spirit.
wd

Walt Dunlap, From "Why I Love Trees.", in Art and Literature