Altruism and Cynicism

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.

Rita Mae Brown, in Altruism and Cynicism

You can't be truly rude until you understand good manners.

Rita Mae Brown, in Altruism and Cynicism

Eulogy: Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

Politeness: The most acceptable hypocrisy.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

The covers of this book are too far apart.

Ambrose Bierce, in Altruism and Cynicism

Never ask the barber if you need a haircut.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

Never deprive someone of hope -- it may be all they have.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

Egoist: A person of low taste, more interested in themselves than in me.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

Money is the root of all evil, and man needs roots.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism and Wealth and Poverty

A bore is a man who, when you ask him how he is, tells you.

Bert Leston Taylor, in Altruism and Cynicism

You can fool too many of the people too much of the time.

James Thurber, in Altruism and Cynicism

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.

Lily Tomlin, in Altruism and Cynicism

It's a recession when your neighbor loses his job; it's a depression when you lose yours.

Harry S Truman, in Altruism and Cynicism

A rumor without a leg to stand on will get around some other way.

John Tudor, in Altruism and Cynicism

Few things are harder to put up with than a good example.

Mark Twain, in Altruism and Cynicism

Good breeding consists of concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.

Mark Twain, in Altruism and Cynicism

I am prepared to meet anyone, but whether anyone is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

Mark Twain, in Altruism and Cynicism

Love many, trust few, and always paddle your own canoe.

Unknown, (old family saying from Ireland), in Altruism and Cynicism

Love your enemies: they'll go crazy trying to figure out what you're up to.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

A single death is a tragedy, a million deaths is statistics.

Josef Stalin, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death