Altruism and Cynicism
173 aphorisms · 15 comments
Aphorisms in This Category
141–160 (174)
tiny.ag/dliywafc · submitted 1997
I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?
Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/bx0vlces · submitted 1997
Man usually avoids attributing cleverness to somebody else -- unless it is an enemy.
Albert Einstein, in Altruism and Cynicism and Success and Failure
tiny.ag/l9caw6tv · submitted 1997
A prig is a fellow who is always making you a present of his opinions.
tiny.ag/kvgolwyi · submitted 1998
The danger today is not so much that machines will learn to think and feel but that men will cease to do so.
tiny.ag/pyitdvns · submitted 1997
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
tiny.ag/u5uejalg · submitted 1999
Never give a sucker an even break and never smarten up a chump.
tiny.ag/vkemi9qo · submitted 1997
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
tiny.ag/gymh6otw · submitted 1997
Man is the only animal that blushes -- or needs to.
tiny.ag/ne1vhxlr · submitted 1997
Never tell the truth to those unworthy of it.
tiny.ag/7do2rifh · submitted 1997
The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.
Mark Twain, What is Man?, 1906, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/r6bo5aic · submitted 1998 by Mark van Essen
Black, white, brown, yellow or even red, we piss with our pants down, and go naked to bed.
tiny.ag/otpgz4zj · submitted 1997
A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.
tiny.ag/5otyux70 · submitted 1997
I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: "O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous." And God granted it.
tiny.ag/58hbs9pq · submitted 1997
It's not true that nice guys finish last. Nice guys are winners before the game even starts.
tiny.ag/qr9ysjed · submitted 1997
Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.
tiny.ag/oswh8aui · submitted 1997
The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well.
tiny.ag/vr4hxjva · submitted 1997
Egoist: A person of low taste, more interested in themselves than in me.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/dxvyak3f · submitted 1997
Eulogy: Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/dzggn7ah · submitted 1997
Politeness: The most acceptable hypocrisy.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/ixcdrxvs · submitted 1997
The covers of this book are too far apart.
141–160 (174)