Altruism and Cynicism
173 aphorisms · 15 comments
Aphorisms in This Category
141–160 (174)
tiny.ag/6jxieopf · submitted 1997
A bore is a man who deprives you of solitude without providing you with company.
tiny.ag/mcsdq3k5 · submitted 1997
A learned County Court judge in a book of memoirs recently said that the overwhelming amount of his time on the bench was taken up "with people who are persuaded by persons whom they do not know to enter into contracts that they do not understand to purchase goods that they do not want with money that they have not got."
tiny.ag/u1edofwc · submitted 1997
One nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.
tiny.ag/dliywafc · submitted 1997
I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?
Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/otpgz4zj · submitted 1997
A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.
tiny.ag/5otyux70 · submitted 1997
I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: "O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous." And God granted it.
tiny.ag/58hbs9pq · submitted 1997
It's not true that nice guys finish last. Nice guys are winners before the game even starts.
tiny.ag/amzxlbug · submitted 1997
All humans are hypocrites; the biggest hypocrite of all is the one who claims to detest hypocrisy.
tiny.ag/k8lcsqdw · submitted 1997
Heck, what's a little extortion among friends?
Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/l9caw6tv · submitted 1997
A prig is a fellow who is always making you a present of his opinions.
tiny.ag/kvgolwyi · submitted 1998
The danger today is not so much that machines will learn to think and feel but that men will cease to do so.
tiny.ag/pyitdvns · submitted 1997
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
tiny.ag/u5uejalg · submitted 1999
Never give a sucker an even break and never smarten up a chump.
tiny.ag/vkemi9qo · submitted 1997
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
tiny.ag/xhlm9fsi · submitted 1997
In spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart.
tiny.ag/gymh6otw · submitted 1997
Man is the only animal that blushes -- or needs to.
tiny.ag/ne1vhxlr · submitted 1997
Never tell the truth to those unworthy of it.
tiny.ag/7do2rifh · submitted 1997
The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.
Mark Twain, What is Man?, 1906, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/r6bo5aic · submitted 1998 by Mark van Essen
Black, white, brown, yellow or even red, we piss with our pants down, and go naked to bed.
tiny.ag/57fvsz6t · submitted 1997
No good deed goes unpunished.
141–160 (174)