Unknown
Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist
281–300 (422)
tiny.ag/aqhc8mvh · submitted 1999 by Glenn Troester
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.
tiny.ag/ugvde1cx · submitted 1997
If bankers can count, how come they have eight windows and only four tellers?
tiny.ag/d6tftb8q · submitted 1997
If everyone would sweep in front of their own door, the whole world would be clean.
Unknown, (Middle Eastern proverb), in Vice and Virtue
tiny.ag/eanvvuth · submitted 1997
If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?
tiny.ag/fwsgb93v · submitted 1997
If it weren't for caffeine I'd have no personality whatsoever.
tiny.ag/piw4y7md · submitted 1997
If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
tiny.ag/rh0iiyqp · submitted 1997
If only I could be respected without having to be respectable.
tiny.ag/gjpds4m8 · submitted 1997
If only I could get that wonderful feeling of accomplishment without having to accomplish anything.
tiny.ag/0xhdtnul · submitted 1997
If people talk negatively about you, live so that no one will believe them.
tiny.ag/ipnqtb0n · submitted 1997
If the effort that went in research on the female bosom had gone into our space program, we would now be running hot dog stands on the moon.
Unknown, in Men and Women
tiny.ag/puraglae · submitted 1997
If the odds are a million to one against something occurring, chances are 50-50 it will.
tiny.ag/up1actjs · submitted 1997
Decay is inherent in all compounded things. Strive on with diligence.
Unknown, (sometimes, almost certainly incorrectly, attributed to the Buddha), in Life and Death
tiny.ag/ynrgodhh · submitted 1997
Death is nature's way of recycling human beings.
tiny.ag/h7w28305 · submitted 1997
Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
Unknown, in Life and Death and Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/z8yeojw9 · submitted 1997
Democracy is a government where you can say what you think even if you don't think.
tiny.ag/4euzwypx · submitted 1997
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
tiny.ag/no2pawla · submitted 1997
Do not believe in miracles -- rely on them.
tiny.ag/b94hkcka · submitted 1997
Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.
tiny.ag/myqpc8fj · submitted 1998 by Mindy Romero
Don't do whatever you like -- like whatever you do.
281–300 (422)