Aphorisms Galore!

Unknown

Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist

tiny.ag/2wniecpg  ·  submitted 1997

It is said that the lonely eagle flies to the mountain peaks while the lowly ant crawls the ground, but cannot the soul of the ant soar as high as the eagle?

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/s7ezrvqx  ·  submitted 1997

It seems like the less a statesman amounts to, the more he loves the flag.

Unknown, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/ulyprgno  ·  submitted 1997

It takes 8,460 bolts to assemble an automobile, and one nut to scatter it all over the road.

Unknown, (bumper sticker), in Life and Death

tiny.ag/r9askkgd  ·  submitted 1997

It usually takes a long time to find a shorter way.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/pe3wjdh9  ·  submitted 1997

Jenkinson's Law: It won't work.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/kgx6jecr  ·  submitted 1997

Jesus died for your sins. Make it worth his time.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/xnqzybth  ·  submitted 1997

Johnson's First Law: When any mechanical contrivance fails, it will do so at the most inconvenient possible time.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/vykjqus7  ·  submitted 1997

Join the Army: travel to exotic distant lands, meet exciting, unusual people and kill them.

Unknown, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/0raepug8  ·  submitted 1997

Jones' Law: The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/6vqkumld  ·  submitted 1997

Just because your doctor has a name for your condition doesn't mean he knows what it is.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/tcqireyb  ·  submitted 1997

Boren's Laws: (1) When in charge, ponder. (2) When in trouble, delegate. (3) When in doubt, mumble.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/zmis8rln  ·  submitted 1997

Bradley's Bromide: If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/dm6wz1hm  ·  submitted 1997

By doing just a little every day, you can gradually let the task completely overwhelm you.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/yfwenbfh  ·  submitted 1997

Capitalism is the unequal distribution of wealth -- communism is the equal distribution of poverty.

Unknown, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/bleirdyt  ·  submitted 1997

Caution: breathing may be hazardous to your health.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/aqk8szqi  ·  submitted 1997

Change is good, but dollars are better.

Unknown, in Wealth and Poverty

tiny.ag/qhswaupg  ·  submitted 1999 by Glenn Troester

Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/nz2qcagl  ·  submitted 1997

Cheer up! Things are getting worse at a slower rate.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/ygktzxcq  ·  submitted 1997

Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/zdywajhx  ·  submitted 1997

Children in the front seat cause accidents, accidents in the back seat cause children.

Unknown, in Life and Death