Aphorisms Galore!

Unknown

Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist

tiny.ag/hsipkpnw  ·  submitted 1997

If you can't learn to do it well, learn to enjoy doing it badly.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/vhuaqm1e  ·  submitted 1997

If you do what you've always done, you'll be what you've always been.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/fpgp1ubk  ·  submitted 1997

I am so evil that heaven won't take me and hell is afraid I'll take over.

Unknown, (T-shirt), in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/qksor8sl  ·  submitted 1997

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/epdarexm  ·  submitted 1999 by Jim Mueller

I wish I were what I was when I wanted to be what I am now.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/f2qlymio  ·  submitted 1997

I'd like to meet the man who invented sex and see what he's working on now.

Unknown, in Love and Hate and Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/lhewzazm  ·  submitted 1997

I'd rather be rich than stupid.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wealth and Poverty

tiny.ag/v0yeshan  ·  submitted 1997

I'm not afraid of work... I can even sleep beside it.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/4asrjxv3  ·  submitted 1997

I'm prepared for all emergencies but totally unprepared for everyday life.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/exb7lihg  ·  submitted 1997

I've had one child. My husband wants to have another. I'd like to watch <EM>him</EM> have another.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/5edntuvq  ·  submitted 1997

If I can be of any help, you're in worse trouble than I thought.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/6jbweh3g  ·  submitted 1999 by John Cannizzaro

If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/fsy6lb1v  ·  submitted 1997

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/stfdm53a  ·  submitted 1997

If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/aqhc8mvh  ·  submitted 1999 by Glenn Troester

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/ugvde1cx  ·  submitted 1997

If bankers can count, how come they have eight windows and only four tellers?

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/d6tftb8q  ·  submitted 1997

If everyone would sweep in front of their own door, the whole world would be clean.

Unknown, (Middle Eastern proverb), in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/lkbki8ft  ·  submitted 1997

For those who fight for it, life has a flavor the sheltered will never know.

Unknown, in Happiness and Misery and Life and Death

tiny.ag/xl1yrua8  ·  submitted 1997

George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but he also admitted doing it. Now, do you know why his father didn't punish him? Because George still had the axe in his hand.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/51wy2e6t  ·  submitted (updated 15 Apr)

Give a man a fish and he'll ask for a lemon. Teach a man to fish and he'll leave work early on Friday.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation