Aphorisms Galore!

Unknown

Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist

tiny.ag/qkpqiaid  ·  submitted 1997

There are two kinds of people: those who work and those who take the credit. It's better to belong to the first group because there is less competition.

Unknown, (Wilson on Home Improvement), in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/ceh5zfoy  ·  submitted 1997

There are two reasons for doing something: a really good reason and the real reason.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/mz7zqsiw  ·  submitted 1997

There are two sides to every divorce: yours and the shithead's.

Unknown, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/tp4xrqcg  ·  submitted 1997

There are two types of dirt: the dark kind, which is attracted to light objects, and the light kind, which is attracted to dark objects.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/h6nrslrd  ·  submitted 1997

There are two types of people: those who divide people into two types, and those who don't.

Unknown, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/wnvuqdit  ·  submitted 1997

There is no difference between a wise man and a fool when they fall in love.

Unknown, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/d0mhaxyw  ·  submitted 1997

Time is God's way of keeping everything from happening at once.

Unknown, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/pb2gjrze  ·  submitted 1997

To be upset over what you don't have is to waste what you do have.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/r3bhbgos  ·  submitted 1997

To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/l9jtfiar  ·  submitted 1997

To err is human, to blame the next guy even more so.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/uijwr4e3  ·  submitted 1997

To err is human, to forgive unusual.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/hhdwpvkc  ·  submitted 1997

To get something done, a committee should consist of no more than three men, two of them absent.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/yqwcpnfd  ·  submitted 1997

To live a perfect life, you must ask nothing, give nothing, and expect nothing.

Unknown, in Happiness and Misery and Life and Death

tiny.ag/pkfmdhte  ·  submitted 1997

When an ordinary man attains knowledge, he is a sage; when a sage attains knowledge, he is an ordinary man.

Unknown, (Zen saying), in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/jlmjkna4  ·  submitted 1997

When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/voscxn53  ·  submitted 1997

When falling in love, some lose their head, others lose their heart.

Unknown, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/idqkjfr5  ·  submitted 1997 by Gord Weitzel

When elephants fight, only the grass gets hurt.

Unknown, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/n51jrfp4  ·  submitted 1997

When a female has tears in her eyes the one who cannot see is the male.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/qhi9mj1t  ·  submitted 1997

Wethern's Law: Assumption is the mother of all screw-ups.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/6e8jdhxa  ·  submitted 1997

To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles.

Unknown, in Law and Politics