Ambrose Bierce
American author and journalist; b. 1842; d. 1913
Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist
1–20 (29)
tiny.ag/osjwdfeg · submitted 1997
Beauty: That power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Life and Death and Men and Women
tiny.ag/ojk8xbtj · submitted 1997
Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/wirqwxvl · submitted 1997
Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.
tiny.ag/ghcdyyrg · submitted 1997
Cannon: An instrument used in the rectification of national boundaries.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in War and Peace
tiny.ag/viymqgdo · submitted 1997
Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum -- "I think that I think, therefore I think that I am."
tiny.ag/azsgcja4 · submitted 1997
Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Wealth and Poverty
tiny.ag/zl0ikbnv · submitted 1997
Coward: one who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.
tiny.ag/zcjracxo · submitted 1997
Diplomacy: The patriotic art of lying for one's country.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Law and Politics
tiny.ag/yfqykgpj · submitted 1997
Education: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the fool their lack of understanding.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Wisdom and Ignorance
tiny.ag/vr4hxjva · submitted 1997
Egoist: A person of low taste, more interested in themselves than in me.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/fiog0z7u · submitted 1997
Alliance: In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted into each others' pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Law and Politics and War and Peace
tiny.ag/lvxaopme · submitted 1997
Accuse: To affirm another's guilt or unworth; most commonly as a justification of ourselves for having wronged them.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Law and Politics
tiny.ag/sp9ytcxh · submitted 1997
Vote: The instrument and symbol of a free man's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Law and Politics
tiny.ag/ixcdrxvs · submitted 1997
The covers of this book are too far apart.
tiny.ag/tldrjftc · submitted 1997
Riot: A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in War and Peace
tiny.ag/l3yahg9k · submitted 1997
Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Health and Disease and Life and Death
tiny.ag/ex5pqdpc · submitted 1997
Pray: To ask that the laws of the universe be nullified on behalf of a single petitioner, admittedly unworthy.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Science and Religion
tiny.ag/dzggn7ah · submitted 1997
Politeness: The most acceptable hypocrisy.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/imyvlox8 · submitted 1997
Misfortune: The kind of fortune that never misses.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Success and Failure
tiny.ag/tckzdvry · submitted 1997
Love: A temporary insanity cureable either by marriage or by removal of the influences under which he incurred the disorder. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than the patient.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Love and Hate
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