Aphorisms Galore!

Ambrose Bierce

American author and journalist; b. 1842; d. 1913

Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist

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The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Alliance: In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted into each others' pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Law and Politics and War and Peace

tiny.ag/lvxaopme  ·   Fair (463 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Accuse: To affirm another's guilt or unworth; most commonly as a justification of ourselves for having wronged them.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/gzduntch  ·   Fair (884 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Science and Religion

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The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Eulogy: Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/vr4hxjva  ·   Fair (1237 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Egoist: A person of low taste, more interested in themselves than in me.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/yfqykgpj  ·   Fair (460 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Education: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the fool their lack of understanding.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Wisdom and Ignorance

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Diplomacy: The patriotic art of lying for one's country.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Law and Politics

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Coward: one who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.

Ambrose Bierce, in Vice and Virtue and War and Peace

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The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Wealth and Poverty

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Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum -- "I think that I think, therefore I think that I am."

Ambrose Bierce, in Wisdom and Ignorance

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The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Cannon: An instrument used in the rectification of national boundaries.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in War and Peace

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Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.

Ambrose Bierce, in Wisdom and Ignorance

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The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/osjwdfeg  ·   Fair (948 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Beauty: That power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Life and Death and Men and Women

tiny.ag/sp9ytcxh  ·   Fair (420 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Vote: The instrument and symbol of a free man's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Law and Politics

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The covers of this book are too far apart.

Ambrose Bierce, in Altruism and Cynicism

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The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Riot: A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/l3yahg9k  ·   Fair (743 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Health and Disease and Life and Death

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The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Pray: To ask that the laws of the universe be nullified on behalf of a single petitioner, admittedly unworthy.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/dzggn7ah  ·   Fair (916 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Politeness: The most acceptable hypocrisy.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism