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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.
Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:
tiny.ag/wpy86lpb · submitted 1997
Luck can't last a lifetime unless you die young.
tiny.ag/yio6tuyz · submitted 1997
The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.
Jack Handey, Deep Thoughts, in Life and Death
tiny.ag/fpwszor9 · submitted 1997
He has half the deed done who has made a beginning.
tiny.ag/s3j4zgfm · submitted 1997
I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.
tiny.ag/qn3ryz0y · submitted 1998
Freedom is not the right to live as we please, but the right to find how we ought to live in order to fulfill our potential.
tiny.ag/hdkst9q4 · submitted 1997
You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there.
tiny.ag/hoklinq4 · submitted 1997
Middle age is youth without levity. And old age without decay.
tiny.ag/o5og0ube · submitted 1997
A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat what you watch.
tiny.ag/g9nfhw0y · submitted 1997
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
tiny.ag/b3ohbca1 · submitted 1998
He who spends his time reading aphorisms of another to have one of his own, has no time or brains to have any of his own.
tiny.ag/soebrnq6 · submitted 1997
Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.
Sam Brown, (Washington Post, 1977), in Wisdom and Ignorance
tiny.ag/f6aon4ji · submitted 1998
Never try to out-stubborn a cat.
Robert A. Heinlein, The Notebooks of Lazarus Long, in Success and Failure
tiny.ag/jgjax6rp · submitted 1999
Take a chance and you may lose. Take not a chance and you have lost already.
tiny.ag/iht7l65u · submitted 1997
Egotism is the anesthetic given by a kindly nature to relieve the pain of being a damned fool.
tiny.ag/ct4xj6gg · submitted 1997
As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality.
tiny.ag/fg9hhljz · submitted 1997
Two things I cannot understand: myself and others.
tiny.ag/bmdpgrs0 · submitted 1997
Let's have some new clichés.
tiny.ag/k4hosucr · submitted 1997
Don't wait for the last judgment; it takes place every day.
tiny.ag/mtktl96r · submitted 1997
Whatever is not nailed down is mine. What I can pry loose is not nailed down.
tiny.ag/yefighwf · submitted 1999
Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.