Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/jvo6jzxe  ·  submitted 1997

Only the mediocre are always at their best.

Jean Giraudoux, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/5rylx71v  ·  submitted 1997

Efficiency is intelligent laziness.

David Dunham, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/b3ohbca1  ·  submitted 1998

He who spends his time reading aphorisms of another to have one of his own, has no time or brains to have any of his own.

M. Bernheisel, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/bpcdcqq7  ·  submitted 1997

Hitch your wagon to a star.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/hobsgyde  ·  submitted 1997

Why be a man when you can be a success?

Bertolt Brecht, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/vfmz7cvr  ·  submitted 1997

If you want a high performance woman, I can go from zero to bitch in less than 2.1 seconds.

Krystal Ann Kraus, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/xkpfj82n  ·  submitted 1997

Religion has done love a great service by making it a sin.

Anatole France, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/f0cqgbjg  ·  submitted 1997

Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.

Philip K. Dick, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/xgpm1arf  ·  submitted 1999

The secret of success is constancy to purpose.

Benjamin Disraeli, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/iqolobqc  ·  submitted 1997

In order to preserve your self-respect, it is sometimes necessary to lie and cheat.

Robert Byrne, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/i0nu42ok  ·  submitted 1997

The difference between fiction and reality is that fiction has to make sense.

Tom Clancy, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/bgvxtarp  ·  submitted 1997

I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.

Thomas Jefferson, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/uejht2oo  ·  submitted 1997

Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality.

Jules de Gaultier, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/zwylfryx  ·  submitted 1997

Dune (paperback)

It is by will alone that I set my mind in motion.

Frank Herbert, Dune, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/ig3zfjp4  ·  submitted 1997

The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.

Winston Churchill, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/iobj0muk  ·  submitted 1997

Cynicism is an unpleasant way of saying the truth.

Lillian Hellman, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/dxbh08ml  ·  submitted 1997

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.

Robert F. Kennedy, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/tldrjftc  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Riot: A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/aoh5h6tb  ·  submitted 1999

Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.

P. J. O'Rourke, All the Trouble in the World, in Altruism and Cynicism and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/uz9atcqm  ·  submitted 1997

The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously.

Hubert H. Humphrey, in Law and Politics