Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/fwsozshx  ·  submitted 1997

If you have a bowl of apples and you eat the best ones first, then you have only the best ones left.

Shelly Horton, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/koexwc3k  ·  submitted 1997

Man is able to do what he is unable to imagine. His head trails a wake through the galaxy of the absurd.

René Char, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/vk93rps4  ·  submitted 1997

We must become the change we want to see.

Mahatma Gandhi, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/if7zb5ls  ·  submitted 1997

Bad policies, stupid policies, gutless policies have real consequences.

Molly Ivins, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/e87wmjqg  ·  submitted 1997

The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/6b9j37a4  ·  submitted 1997

Wise men don't need advice; fools don't take it.

Benjamin Franklin, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/mqbuthzj  ·  submitted 1997 by Brad Johnson

I'd rather die while I'm living than live while I'm dead.

Jimmy Buffett, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/ojpztwu9  ·  submitted 1997

Born a saint, die a sinner -- born a sinner, die a saint.

Doug Horton, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/aoh5h6tb  ·  submitted 1999

Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.

P. J. O'Rourke, All the Trouble in the World, in Altruism and Cynicism and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/slwohzjt  ·  submitted 1997

It's kinda fun to do the impossible.

Walt Disney, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/dxbh08ml  ·  submitted 1997

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.

Robert F. Kennedy, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/8d5pktgj  ·  submitted 1997

A continuing flow of paper is sufficient to continue the flow of paper.

Dyer, Dyer's Law, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/isf8vo05  ·  submitted 1997

Delay is preferable to error.

Thomas Jefferson, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/9kdycunx  ·  submitted 1997

By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve.

Robert Frost, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/fjegbeuo  ·  submitted 1997

I think it would be a good idea.

Mahatma Gandhi, (when asked what he thought of Western civilization), in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/ucas5skv  ·  submitted 1997

Life is the childhood of our immortality.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/dlefcimh  ·  submitted 1997

Comedy is tragedy plus time.

Carol Burnett, in Happiness and Misery

tiny.ag/zpsqkb73  ·  submitted 1997

The more you wrestle with a turd, the more shit gets on you.

Shelly Horton, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/gvfo9jw1  ·  submitted 1997

Education is the period during which you are being instructed by somebody you do not know, about something you do not want to know.

Gilbert K. Chesterton, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/0spygbpd  ·  submitted 1997

Money may be the husk of many things, but not the kernel. It buys you food, but not appetite; medicine, but not health; acquaintances, but not friends; servants, but not loyalty; days of joy, but not peace or happiness.

Henrik Ibsen, in Wealth and Poverty