Aphorisms Galore!

Submissions

These aphorisms have been submitted by users but are not (yet) included in the official collection.

4761–4780 (6206)

tiny.ag/8gl95vkt  ·  submitted 2006

While I would be disappointed if it turned out that I was my evil twin, it would certainly explain a lot.

John Alejandro King (covertcomic.com), America's funniest CIA officer

tiny.ag/sfn7eip9  ·  submitted 2006

When psychics offer half off, isn't that kind of an insult?

John Alejandro King, real CIA officer, The Covert Comic (www.covertcomic.com)

tiny.ag/ton4zap1  ·  submitted 2006

Money is evil. The more you spend the more you are bought.

Leonid S. Sukhorukov

tiny.ag/jz8i2lpe  ·  submitted 2006

  • Everyone is a genius, but not necessarily in the right epoch.

Leonid S. Sukhorukov

tiny.ag/a2kadq3t  ·  submitted 2006

Maybe laughter is a desperate attempt to stop breathing.

John Alejandro King, My War On Terror! - www.covertcomic.com

tiny.ag/qrtbkuvn  ·  submitted 2006

All earthlings are indigenous, but some earthlings are more indigenous than others

The Covert Comic @ www.covertcomic.com, - From 'My War On Terror!'

tiny.ag/n0cziboy  ·  submitted 2006

With all due respect to Maslow, there aren't that many problems you CAN'T solve with a hammer.

The Covert Comic @ www.covertcomic.com, - from 'My War On Terror!'

tiny.ag/3lqdlwra  ·  submitted 2006

Nostalgia ain't what it used to be

Martin Swords, View of a fifty five year old man

tiny.ag/hj2ctivf  ·  submitted 2006

Financial happiness is paying more in income tax than you spend to be happy.

Gary E. Holland

tiny.ag/kcvpf6uc  ·  submitted 2006

When Jesus walked on water, did the water contain significant concentrations of calcium and magnesium ions? Because if it did, that's what chemists call 'hard water,' and my fat-as-a-house Aunt Rosario could walk on THAT stuff.

John Alejandro King ('The Covert Comic'), www.covertcomic.com

tiny.ag/b81yuoc6  ·  submitted 2006

I bet Father Brown could find out who molested all those altar boys.

John Alejandro King ('The Covert Comic'), www.covertcomic.com

tiny.ag/hrdnjzet  ·  submitted 2006

Let's not just sit here doing nothing - let's jog in place.

John Alejandro King ('The Covert Comic'), - www.covertcomic.com

tiny.ag/estvbghi  ·  submitted 2006

If God brought you to it, he will bring you through it

Anonymus, Words to live by

tiny.ag/voxulbi6  ·  submitted 2006

An ounce of mother may be worth a ton of priest, but six inches of priest is now worth several million dollars.

John Alejandro King, from 'My War On Terror!'

tiny.ag/myzfa387  ·  submitted 2006

"Patience is love's wristwatch."

James W. Miller, from book "God Scent" www.godscent.net

tiny.ag/rixdkusa  ·  submitted 2006

  • No matter how long you teach a fool, he still knows everything.

Leonid S.Sukhorukov, Book of aphorisms "All About Everything"

tiny.ag/uyr6pcq0  ·  submitted 2006

  • April Fools' Day slogan: "Fools of the world unite! You've nothing to fear from the wise."

Leonid S.Sukhorukov, Newspaper "London-Info", 31 March 2006

tiny.ag/rz9s2bfj  ·  submitted 2006

If your name was Noam Chomsky, wouldn't YOU become a linguist?

John A. King ('My War On Terror!'), - www.covertcomic.com

tiny.ag/xjs24qre  ·  submitted 2006

One day wasted is one less day to live

Silver, life is short

tiny.ag/flxgicjm  ·  submitted 2006

The penalty for burning an American flag is one year in prison. The penalty for urinating on the flag is also a year. But what if you urinate on the American flag in order to prevent an angry mob from burning it? In that case I think you should receive an official thank you letter from the President of the United States, plus you should only have to go to prison for six months.

John Alejandro King

4761–4780 (6206)