Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/wpy86lpb  ·  submitted 1997

Luck can't last a lifetime unless you die young.

Russell Banks, in Life and Death and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/pu94ynqw  ·  submitted 1997

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

Dean Martin, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/bqie1hj5  ·  submitted 1998

An aphorism is not an aphorism unless you know what it means.

Winston Churchill, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/9kdycunx  ·  submitted 1997

By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve.

Robert Frost, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/bgvxtarp  ·  submitted 1997

I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.

Thomas Jefferson, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/soebrnq6  ·  submitted 1997

Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.

Sam Brown, (Washington Post, 1977), in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/kygnp58l  ·  submitted 1997

To be prepared against surprise is to be trained. To be prepared for surprise is to be educated.

James Carse, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/2cctxyhg  ·  submitted 1997

If we fight a war and win it with H-bombs, what history will remember is not the ideals we were fighting for but the methods we used to accomplish them. These methods will be compared to the warfare of Genghis Khan who ruthlessly killed every last inhabitant of Persia.

Hans A. Bethe, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/ufko7fwv  ·  submitted 1997

I do not know myself and God forbid that I should.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/1i8zitnu  ·  submitted 1998

I wish to have no connection with any ship that does not sail fast; for I intend to go in harms way.

John Paul Jones, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/qiy9xdhn  ·  submitted 1997

To "be" means to be related.

Alfred Korzybski, Science and Sanity, 1933 (4th ed., 1958), in Science and Religion and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/2ohv3gf8  ·  submitted 1997

The reward of a thing well done is to have done it.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/jvo6jzxe  ·  submitted 1997

Only the mediocre are always at their best.

Jean Giraudoux, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/j0vq6ox3  ·  submitted 1997

Beauty is variable, ugliness is constant.

Doug Horton, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/nxwvhtlg  ·  submitted 1997

Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.

Timothy Leary, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/tmupilkz  ·  submitted 1997

If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.

Albert Einstein, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/1jtdasvn  ·  submitted 1997

Enlighten the people generally, and tyranny and oppressions of body and mind will vanish like evil spirits at the dawn of day.

Thomas Jefferson, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/rnxbf2ho  ·  submitted 1998

I hope life isn't a joke, because I don't get it.

Jack Handey, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/tvfsj7gx  ·  submitted 1997

I don't feel good.

Luther Burbank, (dying words), in Life and Death

tiny.ag/mgtvsjqa  ·  submitted 1997

Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.

Thomas Alva Edison, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation