Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/fwsozshx  ·  submitted 1997

If you have a bowl of apples and you eat the best ones first, then you have only the best ones left.

Shelly Horton, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/hh0kfr5w  ·  submitted 1997

The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That's where we come in; we're computer professionals. We cause accidents.

Nathaniel Borenstein, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/xgpm1arf  ·  submitted 1999

The secret of success is constancy to purpose.

Benjamin Disraeli, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/gokrtfpu  ·  submitted 1997

If I don't know I don't know, I think I know. If I don't know I know, I think I don't know.

R. D. Laing, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/czhkruer  ·  submitted 1997

Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.

Robert Orben, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/soebrnq6  ·  submitted 1997

Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.

Sam Brown, (Washington Post, 1977), in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/zzbstsyk  ·  submitted 1997

If the aborigine drafted an I.Q. test, all of Western civilization would presumably flunk it.

Stanley Garn, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/hyedkhd2  ·  submitted 1997

It is the province of knowledge to speak, and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen.

Oliver Wendell Holmes, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/mtktl96r  ·  submitted 1997

Whatever is not nailed down is mine. What I can pry loose is not nailed down.

Collis P. Huntington, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/zdvgyvsm  ·  submitted 1997

Be braver -- you can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.

David Lloyd George, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/1jtdasvn  ·  submitted 1997

Enlighten the people generally, and tyranny and oppressions of body and mind will vanish like evil spirits at the dawn of day.

Thomas Jefferson, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/cz34szjm  ·  submitted 1997

My sources are unreliable, but their information is fascinating.

Ashleigh Brilliant, Brilliant Thoughts (copyright info: www.ashleighbrilliant.com), in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/bmdpgrs0  ·  submitted 1997

Let's have some new clichés.

Samuel Goldwyn, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/tymlwb79  ·  submitted 1997

For a man to achieve all that is demanded of him, he must regard himself as greater than he is.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, in Vice and Virtue and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/7alftveq  ·  submitted 1997

I don't know with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.

Albert Einstein, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/zhi7upjz  ·  submitted 1997

I would sooner fail than not be among the greatest.

John Keats, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/m6lj8yot  ·  submitted 1997

Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions -- it only guarantees equality of opportunity.

Irving Kristol, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/jwhevbgo  ·  submitted 1997

My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.

Christopher Morley, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/yuezt1iy  ·  submitted 1997

A painting in a museum probably hears more foolish remarks than anything else in the world.

Edmond Jules Goncourt, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/g9nfhw0y  ·  submitted 1997

Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.

Albert Camus, in Work and Recreation