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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.
Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:
tiny.ag/nvfl7j9k · submitted 1997
Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you'll have to ram them down people's throats.
tiny.ag/odq1svy5 · submitted 1997
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
tiny.ag/iht7l65u · submitted 1997
Egotism is the anesthetic given by a kindly nature to relieve the pain of being a damned fool.
tiny.ag/ucas5skv · submitted 1997
Life is the childhood of our immortality.
tiny.ag/ooxlc4p0 · submitted 1997
Boring people are a reflection of boring people.
tiny.ag/9whxy8s7 · submitted 1997
Life is not lost by dying; life is lost minute by minute, day by dragging day, in all the thousand small uncaring ways.
tiny.ag/w4s36qc2 · submitted 1997
A friend might well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.
tiny.ag/ikcjtldg · submitted 1997
A celebrity is a person who is known for his well-knownness.
tiny.ag/zpsqkb73 · submitted 1997
The more you wrestle with a turd, the more shit gets on you.
tiny.ag/mydapq7x · submitted 1999 by Megan
To accomplish great things, you must not only act but also dream, not only dream but also believe.
tiny.ag/dkwhzql3 · submitted 1997
Joy is not in things, it is in us.
tiny.ag/tymlwb79 · submitted 1997
For a man to achieve all that is demanded of him, he must regard himself as greater than he is.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, in Vice and Virtue and Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/jvo6jzxe · submitted 1997
Only the mediocre are always at their best.
tiny.ag/poggndv0 · submitted 1997
Be polite to all, but intimate with few.
tiny.ag/pu94ynqw · submitted 1997
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
tiny.ag/axybc0uz · submitted 1997
With love and patience, nothing is impossible.
tiny.ag/tcyzf8gu · submitted 1999 by David Knight
An expert is someone who is one page ahead of you in the manual.
tiny.ag/8d5pktgj · submitted 1997
A continuing flow of paper is sufficient to continue the flow of paper.
Dyer, Dyer's Law, in Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/nqhblasx · submitted 1997
It is perfectly true that the government is best which governs least. It is equally true that the government is best which provides most.
tiny.ag/uvpjrb6x · submitted 1997
Desperation is like stealing from the mafia: you stand a good chance of attracting the wrong attention.