Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/o5og0ube  ·  submitted 1997

A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat what you watch.

Hermione Gingold, in Food and Drink

tiny.ag/6thfwduq  ·  submitted 1999

Romance is built on illusion, and when we love someone, we love the illusion they have created for us.

Roger Ebert, (from review of Boys Don't Cry, Oct. 22, 1999), in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/nzeorxiy  ·  submitted 1997

Every calling is great when greatly pursued.

Oliver Wendell Holmes, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/axybc0uz  ·  submitted 1997

With love and patience, nothing is impossible.

Daisaku Ikeda, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/l5snrywf  ·  submitted 1997

Conscience is the window of our spirit, evil is the curtain.

Doug Horton, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/z91tc0go  ·  submitted 1997

It's better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you're stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/ieyckbys  ·  submitted 1997

A blow with a word strikes deeper than a blow with a sword.

Robert Burton, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/9qotdgih  ·  submitted 1999

Jesus may love you, but I think you're garbage wrapped in skin.

Doug Kenney, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/tuvabnig  ·  submitted 1999

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate

tiny.ag/nqhblasx  ·  submitted 1997

It is perfectly true that the government is best which governs least. It is equally true that the government is best which provides most.

Walter Lippmann, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/w4s36qc2  ·  submitted 1997

A friend might well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/8bpf0foj  ·  submitted 1997

I am become death, shatterer of worlds.

Robert J. Oppenheimer, (quoting the Bhagavadgita after witnessing the first nuclear explosion), in War and Peace

tiny.ag/yamidgsg  ·  submitted 1999

Ignorance does not necesarilly mean one has a lack of wisdom, for a most ignorant person can be one with much wisdom. It's "live and learn" that creates wisdom.

Austin Holmes, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/qh2wpltu  ·  submitted 1997

All mankind loves a lover.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/losztnwc  ·  submitted 1997

Imagination is more important than knowledge.

Albert Einstein, in Science and Religion and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/eoc1jiyu  ·  submitted 1997

There are three kinds of lies: Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics.

Benjamin Disraeli, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/vmqykh2c  ·  submitted 1997

Catch-22 (paperback)

The Lord gave us farmers two strong hands so we could grab as much as we could with both of them.

Joseph Heller, Catch-22, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/ndewfsya  ·  submitted 1997

The great question -- which I have not been able to answer -- is, "What does a woman want?"

Sigmund Freud, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/gfpih4lb  ·  submitted 1997

He who desires, but acts not, breeds pestilence.

William Blake, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/jcg8ibwt  ·  submitted 1997

Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Wisdom and Ignorance