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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.
Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:
tiny.ag/vfmz7cvr · submitted 1997
If you want a high performance woman, I can go from zero to bitch in less than 2.1 seconds.
tiny.ag/1i8zitnu · submitted 1998
I wish to have no connection with any ship that does not sail fast; for I intend to go in harms way.
tiny.ag/yqgp7fad · submitted 1997
I do not want my house to be walled in on all sides and my windows to be stuffed. I want the cultures of all the lands to be blown about my house as freely as possible. But I refuse to be blown off my feet by any.
tiny.ag/yzqij6mr · submitted 1997
I've never met a healthy person who worried much about his health or a good person who worried much about his soul.
Haldane, in Vice and Virtue and Vice and Virtue
tiny.ag/ndewfsya · submitted 1997
The great question -- which I have not been able to answer -- is, "What does a woman want?"
tiny.ag/slwohzjt · submitted 1997
It's kinda fun to do the impossible.
tiny.ag/kl7xzzq3 · submitted 1997
An eye for an eye would make the whole world blind.
tiny.ag/j0xwttzq · submitted 1997
The happiness of the bee and the dolphin is to exist. For man it is to know that and to wonder at it.
tiny.ag/fg9hhljz · submitted 1997
Two things I cannot understand: myself and others.
tiny.ag/tq4jumf6 · submitted 1997
Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember.
tiny.ag/tuvabnig · submitted 1999
Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.
Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate
tiny.ag/nvdb2cfz · submitted 1997
Burning desire is the eternal flame.
tiny.ag/iht7l65u · submitted 1997
Egotism is the anesthetic given by a kindly nature to relieve the pain of being a damned fool.
tiny.ag/bpu9tj3d · submitted 1997
It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues.
tiny.ag/fpwszor9 · submitted 1997
He has half the deed done who has made a beginning.
tiny.ag/k4hosucr · submitted 1997
Don't wait for the last judgment; it takes place every day.
tiny.ag/zhi7upjz · submitted 1997
I would sooner fail than not be among the greatest.
tiny.ag/f6aon4ji · submitted 1998
Never try to out-stubborn a cat.
Robert A. Heinlein, The Notebooks of Lazarus Long, in Success and Failure
tiny.ag/9bumiall · submitted 1997
There's nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all.
tiny.ag/cgydzmit · submitted 1997
To know is to know that you know nothing. That is the meaning of true knowledge.