Life and Death
196 aphorisms · 11 comments
Aphorisms in This Category
121–140 (196)
tiny.ag/6vqkumld · submitted 1997
Just because your doctor has a name for your condition doesn't mean he knows what it is.
tiny.ag/jmkw4qmh · submitted 1997
Life is a fatal, sexually transmitted disease.
tiny.ag/sbtlzeuy · submitted 1997
Life is like a raffle -- you must be present to win.
tiny.ag/ckyj1g65 · submitted 1997
Life's a bitch, and then she has puppies.
Unknown, in Life and Death and Success and Failure
tiny.ag/nzh7mkgj · submitted 1997
Living on Earth may be expensive, but it includes an annual free trip around the Sun.
tiny.ag/mefigsvw · submitted 1997
Living your life is a task so difficult, it has never been attempted before.
tiny.ag/ngzfgtnp · submitted 1997
Man did not weave the web of life, he is merely a strand in it. Whatever he does to the web, he does to himself.
tiny.ag/wpy86lpb · submitted 1997
Luck can't last a lifetime unless you die young.
tiny.ag/osjwdfeg · submitted 1997
Beauty: That power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Life and Death and Men and Women
tiny.ag/hwk0yobb · submitted 1997
All I ask of life is a constant and exaggerated sense of my own importance.
Unknown, in Life and Death and Success and Failure
tiny.ag/lewynsak · submitted 1997
Always remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else.
tiny.ag/uys04zyz · submitted 1997
Be an optimist -- at least until they start moving animals in pairs to Cape Kennedy.
tiny.ag/bleirdyt · submitted 1997
Caution: breathing may be hazardous to your health.
tiny.ag/ygktzxcq · submitted 1997
Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.
tiny.ag/zdywajhx · submitted 1997
Children in the front seat cause accidents, accidents in the back seat cause children.
tiny.ag/dxqkz8bq · submitted 1997
Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.
tiny.ag/7a4ntqxo · submitted 1997
Cox's Philosophy: Life's a bitch, and then you die.
Unknown, in Life and Death and Success and Failure
tiny.ag/tqq05igh · submitted 1997
Death and taxes may always be with us, but death at least doesn't get any worse.
tiny.ag/hcogkx8m · submitted 1997
Death is God's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy.
tiny.ag/ynrgodhh · submitted 1997
Death is nature's way of recycling human beings.
121–140 (196)