Altruism and Cynicism
173 aphorisms · 15 comments
Aphorisms in This Category
81–100 (174)
tiny.ag/lu0qepci · submitted 1997
An enemy is anyone who tells the truth about you.
tiny.ag/o1xf5nap · submitted 1997
If a feller says, "It's not the money, it's the principle of the thing," it's the money.
tiny.ag/4tfl7wlh · submitted 1997
Never insult an alligator until after you have crossed the river.
tiny.ag/mtktl96r · submitted 1997
Whatever is not nailed down is mine. What I can pry loose is not nailed down.
tiny.ag/ahfxksue · submitted 1997
You can't be truly rude until you understand good manners.
tiny.ag/p2zj718l · submitted 1997
The only absolute knowledge worth attaining is that your life is meaningless. -- My life? Well now, that's another story...
tiny.ag/rx3wkhug · submitted 1997
You are cautious in showing your true self to others. Have you thought about plastic surgery?
tiny.ag/qr9ysjed · submitted 1997
Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.
tiny.ag/bx0vlces · submitted 1997
Man usually avoids attributing cleverness to somebody else -- unless it is an enemy.
Albert Einstein, in Altruism and Cynicism and Success and Failure
tiny.ag/l9caw6tv · submitted 1997
A prig is a fellow who is always making you a present of his opinions.
tiny.ag/hjysnvry · submitted 1997
If it looks like shit, smells like shit, mail it to your enemy -- he'll know what to do with it.
tiny.ag/vpchszet · submitted 1997
If the destination is heaven, why do we scramble to be first in line for hell?
tiny.ag/bggvrf05 · submitted 1997
If you love something, turn it loose. If it doesn't come back, kill it!
tiny.ag/nxpusxd1 · submitted 1997
Live to learn, learn to live, then teach others.
tiny.ag/2cihxuml · submitted 1997
Materialism is the only form of distraction from true bliss.
tiny.ag/fjmqiepc · submitted 1997
Smile, it's better than a poke in the eye.
tiny.ag/rlehkt4m · submitted 1997
Smile, it's free therapy.
tiny.ag/kje1nil8 · submitted 1997
Grub first, then ethics.
tiny.ag/co7binat · submitted 1997
The simplest act of surrealism is to walk out into the street, gun in hand, and shoot at random.
tiny.ag/nsami72o · submitted 1997
I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it.
Ashleigh Brilliant, Brilliant Thoughts (copyright info: www.ashleighbrilliant.com), in Altruism and Cynicism and Law and Politics
81–100 (174)