Aphorisms Galore!

Altruism and Cynicism

173 aphorisms  ·  15 comments

Aphorisms in This Category

tiny.ag/dxvyak3f  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Eulogy: Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/dzggn7ah  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Politeness: The most acceptable hypocrisy.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/ixcdrxvs  ·  submitted 1997

The covers of this book are too far apart.

Ambrose Bierce, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/rxylykkp  ·  submitted 1997

Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.

Mother Teresa, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/crm6g7ll  ·  submitted 1997

We can do no great things; only small things with great love.

Mother Teresa, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/f9zmepch  ·  submitted 1997

He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.

H. H. Munro, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/1make2qd  ·  submitted 1997

The Brothers Karamazov (paperback)

Everything is permitted.

Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Brothers Karamazov, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/tacuwmyh  ·  submitted 1997

He who hesitates is probably smart... or maybe stapled to the floor.

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/v128alif  ·  submitted 1997

In the country of the blind, the one-eyed man is king... and the one-eyed man with the high heels and the feather boa is queen.

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/9xelzoym  ·  submitted 1997

Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think, and a docudrama with ugly actors for those who film docudramas.

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death

tiny.ag/tnwmsadk  ·  submitted 1997

Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.

Thomas Jones, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/rxmfom0a  ·  submitted 1997

The relationship between truth and a newspaper is like the relationship between the color green and the number seven. Occasionally you will see the number seven written in green, but you learn not to expect this.

Garrison Keillor, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/nqcfjvh0  ·  submitted 1997

Natives who beat drums to drive off evil spirits are objects of scorn to smart Americans who blow horns to break up traffic jams.

Mary Ellen Kelly, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/sc3tpgkp  ·  submitted 1997

We have met the enemy, and he is us.

Walt Kelly, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/mnrh4p2b  ·  submitted 1997

Always forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.

John F. Kennedy, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/xhg05ovb  ·  submitted 1997

I never know how much of what I say is true.

Bette Midler, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/gvohc8br  ·  submitted 1997

In nature, there are neither rewards nor punishments -- there are consequences.

Robert G. Ingersoll, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/poggndv0  ·  submitted 1997

Be polite to all, but intimate with few.

Thomas Jefferson, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/fjmqiepc  ·  submitted 1997

Smile, it's better than a poke in the eye.

Doug Horton, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/rlehkt4m  ·  submitted 1997

Smile, it's free therapy.

Doug Horton, in Altruism and Cynicism