Altruism and Cynicism
173 aphorisms · 15 comments
Aphorisms in This Category
81–100 (174)
tiny.ag/fcmzdpy1 · submitted 1997
A book may be compared to the life of your neighbor. If it be good, it cannot last too long; if bad, you cannot get rid of it too early.
tiny.ag/iht7l65u · submitted 1997
Egotism is the anesthetic given by a kindly nature to relieve the pain of being a damned fool.
tiny.ag/764yzbuo · submitted 1997
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
tiny.ag/fmchbiz9 · submitted 1997
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.
tiny.ag/ahfxksue · submitted 1997
You can't be truly rude until you understand good manners.
tiny.ag/xhlm9fsi · submitted 1997
In spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart.
tiny.ag/amzxlbug · submitted 1997
All humans are hypocrites; the biggest hypocrite of all is the one who claims to detest hypocrisy.
tiny.ag/k8lcsqdw · submitted 1997
Heck, what's a little extortion among friends?
Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/dliywafc · submitted 1997
I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?
Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/kvgolwyi · submitted 1998
The danger today is not so much that machines will learn to think and feel but that men will cease to do so.
tiny.ag/pyitdvns · submitted 1997
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
tiny.ag/u5uejalg · submitted 1999
Never give a sucker an even break and never smarten up a chump.
tiny.ag/vkemi9qo · submitted 1997
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
tiny.ag/gymh6otw · submitted 1997
Man is the only animal that blushes -- or needs to.
tiny.ag/ne1vhxlr · submitted 1997
Never tell the truth to those unworthy of it.
tiny.ag/7do2rifh · submitted 1997
The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.
Mark Twain, What is Man?, 1906, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/r6bo5aic · submitted 1998 by Mark van Essen
Black, white, brown, yellow or even red, we piss with our pants down, and go naked to bed.
tiny.ag/otpgz4zj · submitted 1997
A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.
tiny.ag/5otyux70 · submitted 1997
I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: "O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous." And God granted it.
tiny.ag/58hbs9pq · submitted 1997
It's not true that nice guys finish last. Nice guys are winners before the game even starts.
81–100 (174)