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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, discussing, and rating aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.
Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities, their ratings, and how new they are to the collection:
Commenttiny.ag/iht7l65u · ★★☆☆ Fair (521 ratings) · submitted 1997
Egotism is the anesthetic given by a kindly nature to relieve the pain of being a damned fool.
Commenttiny.ag/cgjakfr4 · ★★☆☆ Fair (384 ratings) · submitted 1997
So of cheerfulness, or a good temper, the more it is spent, the more it remains.
Commenttiny.ag/hifvkpkc · ★★☆☆ Fair (328 ratings) · submitted 1997 ·
A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.
Commenttiny.ag/rdqgrf59 · ★★☆☆ Fair (370 ratings) · submitted 1997 ·
Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.
Commenttiny.ag/pmqy9n03 · ★★☆☆ Fair (782 ratings) · submitted 1997
It's better to waste one's youth than to do nothing with it at all.
Commenttiny.ag/la8pw7kl · ★★☆☆ Fair (381 ratings) · submitted 1997
We have had an Imperial lesson; it may make us an Empire yet!
Commenttiny.ag/tuvabnig · ★★☆☆ Fair (890 ratings) · submitted 1999 ·
Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.
Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate
Commenttiny.ag/o5og0ube · ★★☆☆ Fair (692 ratings) · submitted 1997
A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat what you watch.
Commenttiny.ag/kge2ejcq · ★★☆☆ Fair (202 ratings) · submitted 1997
It is seldom that liberty of any kind is lost all at once.
Commenttiny.ag/gu6tloek · ★★☆☆ Fair (298 ratings) · submitted 1997
An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought.
Simon Cameron, in Altruism and Cynicism and Law and Politics
Commenttiny.ag/phdwhmxt · ★★☆☆ Fair (632 ratings) · submitted 1997
I prefer the most unjust peace to the most righteous war.
Cicero, in War and Peace
Commenttiny.ag/pu94ynqw · ★★☆☆ Fair (299 ratings) · submitted 1997
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
Commenttiny.ag/xkpfj82n · ★★☆☆ Fair (490 ratings) · submitted 1997 ·
Religion has done love a great service by making it a sin.
Commenttiny.ag/hyedkhd2 · ★★☆☆ Fair (330 ratings) · submitted 1997
It is the province of knowledge to speak, and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen.
Commenttiny.ag/vmqykh2c · ★★☆☆ Fair (1049 ratings) · submitted 1997
The Lord gave us farmers two strong hands so we could grab as much as we could with both of them.
Joseph Heller, Catch-22, in Work and Recreation
Catch-22 (paperback)Commenttiny.ag/9qotdgih · ★★☆☆ Fair (684 ratings) · submitted 1999
Jesus may love you, but I think you're garbage wrapped in skin.
Commenttiny.ag/pxnbu4ey · ★★☆☆ Fair (820 ratings) · submitted 1997
A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke.