Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, discussing, and rating aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities, their ratings, and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/w4pngtxm  ·   Fair (1364 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999 by Ron Leemans

Leemans' Law: Junk expands to fill the space allotted.

Ron Leemans, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/ajjiywbg  ·   Fair (230 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

It costs to be stupid. The stupider you are, the more it costs.

Sherrill Brown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/gvfo9jw1  ·   Fair (547 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Education is the period during which you are being instructed by somebody you do not know, about something you do not want to know.

Gilbert K. Chesterton, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/yuezt1iy  ·   Fair (377 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

A painting in a museum probably hears more foolish remarks than anything else in the world.

Edmond Jules Goncourt, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/l4pyn7j8  ·   Fair (472 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

I will answer anything I can with honor, but not about others.

John Brown, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/fed8pqej  ·   Fair (1052 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997 by David Epstein

Disorder increases with time because we measure time in the direction in which disorder increases.

Stephen Hawking, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/gvohc8br  ·   Fair (3332 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

In nature, there are neither rewards nor punishments -- there are consequences.

Robert G. Ingersoll, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/p6bwfqfr  ·   Fair (702 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

P. J. O'Rourke, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/ucas5skv  ·   Fair (1249 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Life is the childhood of our immortality.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/jvo6jzxe  ·   Fair (257 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Only the mediocre are always at their best.

Jean Giraudoux, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/hfx4m7bz  ·   Fair (555 ratings)  ·  submitted 1998 by David Shorr

The Satyricon (paperback)

Wisdom and beauty form a very rare combination

Petronius Arbiter, The Satyricon, XCIV, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/kygnp58l  ·   Fair (334 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

To be prepared against surprise is to be trained. To be prepared for surprise is to be educated.

James Carse, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/hobsgyde  ·   Fair (343 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Why be a man when you can be a success?

Bertolt Brecht, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/hdkst9q4  ·   Fair (445 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there.

Yogi Berra, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/dxbh08ml  ·   Fair (370 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.

Robert F. Kennedy, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/rxe07t5e  ·   Fair (506 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand.

Benny Hill, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/qn3ryz0y  ·   Fair (408 ratings)  ·  submitted 1998

Freedom is not the right to live as we please, but the right to find how we ought to live in order to fulfill our potential.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/gokrtfpu  ·   Fair (563 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

If I don't know I don't know, I think I know. If I don't know I know, I think I don't know.

R. D. Laing, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/eoc1jiyu  ·   Fair (591 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

There are three kinds of lies: Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics.

Benjamin Disraeli, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/9whxy8s7  ·   Fair (549 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Life is not lost by dying; life is lost minute by minute, day by dragging day, in all the thousand small uncaring ways.

Stephen Vincent Benét, in Life and Death