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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/pu94ynqw · submitted 1997

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

Dean Martin, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/zwylfryx · submitted 1997

It is by will alone that I set my mind in motion.

Frank Herbert, Dune, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/bmdpgrs0 · submitted 1997

Let's have some new clichÃ©s.

Samuel Goldwyn, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/jx4okg6p · submitted 1999 by Michael A. Loduha

When skunks duel, wind direction is everything.

Michael A. Loduha, (on environmental factors in legal cases vs. the attorneys' skills; from a lecture series), in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/czhkruer · submitted 1997

Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.

Robert Orben, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/fjegbeuo · submitted 1997

I think it would be a good idea.

Mahatma Gandhi, (when asked what he thought of Western civilization), in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/qycsaode · submitted 1997

When angry, count to ten before you speak; when very angry, a hundred.

Thomas Jefferson, Writings, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/tvfsj7gx · submitted 1997

I don't feel good.

Luther Burbank, (dying words), in Life and Death

tiny.ag/hifvkpkc · submitted 1997

A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.

Doug Larson, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/ctd7inn0 · submitted 1997

I got a simple rule about everybody. If you don't treat me right, shame on you.

Louis Armstrong, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/5gcdbjbx · submitted 1997

Genius is one per cent inspiration and ninety-nine per cent perspiration.

Thomas Alva Edison, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/b5zelloy · submitted 1997

Education is a better safeguard of liberty than a standing army.

Edward Everett, in War and Peace and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/64hrko9k · submitted 1997

I have sworn upon the altar of God eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man.

Thomas Jefferson, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/hh0kfr5w · submitted 1997

The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That's where we come in; we're computer professionals. We cause accidents.

Nathaniel Borenstein, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/l4pyn7j8 · submitted 1997

I will answer anything I can with honor, but not about others.

John Brown, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/xgpm1arf · submitted 1999

The secret of success is constancy to purpose.

Benjamin Disraeli, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/tq4jumf6 · submitted 1997

Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember.

Oscar Levant, in Happiness and Misery

tiny.ag/2ohv3gf8 · submitted 1997

The reward of a thing well done is to have done it.