Aphorisms Galore!

Submissions

These aphorisms have been submitted by users but are not (yet) included in the official collection.

4181–4200 (5680)

tiny.ag/jqkem1gl  ·  submitted 2007

Is that a nanomachine in your pocket, or are you not all that glad to see me?

John Alejandro King, 'The Covert Comic', - from 'The Naked Intelligence Officer'

tiny.ag/jza2veqi  ·  submitted 2007

The good news: there are no longer more of them than there are of us.

The bad news: there are now more of us than there are of us.

John Alejandro King, - 'Black Matters' (www.covertcomic.com)

tiny.ag/6tvygsz7  ·  submitted 2007

Common sense is the ability to spontaneously create new knowledge using only existing knowledge.

Matthew D. Burrows, Long Beach, CA

tiny.ag/nw42iiob  ·  submitted 2007

Have you ever been walking along, and suddenly the toe of your shoe catches on the ground and you almost trip and fall on your face?

No?

... Good, me neither (I was just checking).

John Alejandro King, 'The Covert Comic', www.covertcomic.com

tiny.ag/fhgp1asq  ·  submitted 2007

Secret #37.6691. If a secret message doesn't self-destruct before you read it, it probably isn't worth your time.

The Covert Comic @ www.covertcomic.com, from 'My War On Terror!'

tiny.ag/nyrwt6hq  ·  submitted 2007

To laugh at life isn't so hard, once you master the rapid pulmonary convulsions.

John Alejandro King, www.covertcomic.com, from 'My War On Terror!'

tiny.ag/kfmws6id  ·  submitted 2007

From the day we are born, we are all slowly dieing of life.

Nick Palmer

tiny.ag/asr2o8j9  ·  submitted 2007

No matter what a man might claim to know, he will never know who will show up to his funeral.

Nick Palmer

tiny.ag/fm04pnor  ·  submitted 2007

I know itÂ’s just a silly superstition, but I never go out of the house without my lucky gun.

John Alejandro King, www.covertcomic.com, from 'Real Men Don't Get Published'

tiny.ag/hnmudbyu  ·  submitted 2007

Have you ever been walking along, and suddenly the toe of your shoe catches on the ground and you almost trip and fall on your face?

No?

... Good, me neither (I was just checking).

John Alejandro King, www.covertcomic.com, from 'My War On Terror!'

tiny.ag/lg0vu7ym  ·  submitted 2007

Actually, here in the future, what everyone longs for is 15 minutes of total anonymity.

John Alejandro King, www.covertcomic.com, America's funniest intelligence officer!

tiny.ag/gx8phez1  ·  submitted 2007

  • The quality of the flea is their quantity.

Leonid S. Sukhorukov, Quality and quantity

tiny.ag/laf0uklm  ·  submitted 2007

  • Nowhere in Nature can one twitter so mellifluously as on the branches of power.

Leonid S. Sukhorukov, Politics

tiny.ag/6rgf5nyj  ·  submitted 2007

  • For some religion cures the soul, to others it sickens the mind.

Leonid S. Sukhorukov, Religion

tiny.ag/msazolid  ·  submitted 2007

  • Money is evil... and the less we have of it the more evil it becomes. Leonid S. Sukhorukov

Leonid S. Sukhorukov, Money

tiny.ag/y81bcvdj  ·  submitted 2007

  • Envy is immortal - much to the envy of the envious! Leonid S. Sukhorukov

Leonid S. Sukhorukov, Envy

tiny.ag/302ajwdx  ·  submitted 2007

I assume God isn't constantly depressed at the suffering of those souls cast into hell for all eternity for denying Him. On the other hand, I assume God doesn't just forget about these people either.

... Probably God is sort of mildly bummed out all the time.

John Alejandro King, 'The Covert Comic', from 'My War On Terror!'

tiny.ag/13sf9i0w  ·  submitted 2007

To live in your own toilet may be unsanitary, but you can't say it's inconvenient.

John Alejandro King, 'The Covert Comic', www.covertcomic.com

tiny.ag/higwv75x  ·  submitted 2007

There is no Comedian but Allah, and you are His straight man.

John Alejandro King, 'The Covert Comic', www.covertcomic.com

tiny.ag/wnohaxim  ·  submitted 2007

"Life is an interesting place to Live."

Ken Scarborough

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