Aphorisms Galore!

Love and Hate

114 aphorisms  ·  13 comments

Aphorisms in This Category

tiny.ag/opp6altk  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Happiness: An agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Love and Hate and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/snlzrsu1  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Hatred: A sentiment appropriate to the occasion of another's superiority.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Love and Hate and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/3b0kjrvh  ·  submitted 1997

Helpmate: A wife, or bitter half.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/rfa7bnoi  ·  submitted 1997

Incompatibility: In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/tckzdvry  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Love: A temporary insanity cureable either by marriage or by removal of the influences under which he incurred the disorder. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than the patient.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/e7vc1gep  ·  submitted 1997

Wedding is destiny, and hanging likewise.

John Heywood, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/toy71ing  ·  submitted 1997

Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/lkwaonin  ·  submitted 1997

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

Sacha Guitry, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/t9m3smqg  ·  submitted 1997

Women make love for love, men make love for lust.

Derrick Harge, in Love and Hate and Men and Women

tiny.ag/ji1h0t57  ·  submitted 1997

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Thomas Haynes Bayly, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/ua3yjc0t  ·  submitted 1999

It is the ordinary women that know something about love. The gorgeous ones are too busy being gorgeous.

Katharine Hepburn, in Love and Hate and Men and Women

tiny.ag/9vuuezdd  ·  submitted 1997

Love and a cough cannot be hidden.

George Herbert, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/9qdtckr1  ·  submitted 1997

Love is like a fruit. It may look good, but you shouldn't bite in it until it's ripe.

Nick Hertl, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/tuvabnig  ·  submitted 1999

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate

tiny.ag/wvl3nfch  ·  submitted 1997

Love is the answer. But while you're waiting for the answer, sex brings up some pretty good questions.

Woody Allen, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/gewaqimj  ·  submitted 1997

Marriage is the death of hope.

Woody Allen, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/sxvbnrzm  ·  submitted 1997

Sex without love is an empty gesture. But as empty gestures go, it is one of the best.

Woody Allen, Love and Death, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/lakz6spw  ·  submitted 1997

Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly.

Voltaire, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/5upxjjc2  ·  submitted 1997

A bachelor is a selfish, undeserving guy who has cheated some woman out of a divorce.

Don Quinn, in Love and Hate and Men and Women

tiny.ag/udhekgkz  ·  submitted 1997

Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.

Jules Renard, in Love and Hate