Unknown

Death is God's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy.

Unknown, in Life and Death

DeVries' Dilemma: If you hit two keys on the typewriter, the one you don't want hits the paper.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Cynics are made, not born.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

Cox's Philosophy: Life's a bitch, and then you die.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Success and Failure

Contention is better than loneliness.

Unknown, in Love and Hate

Conquering Russia should be done steppe by steppe.

Unknown, in War and Peace

Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Children in the front seat cause accidents, accidents in the back seat cause children.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Cheer up! Things are getting worse at a slower rate.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Death and taxes may always be with us, but death at least doesn't get any worse.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Dealing with failure is easy: Work hard to improve. Success is also easy to handle: You've solved the wrong problem. Work hard to improve.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Anthony's Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll into the least accessible corner of the workshop.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Before the beginning of great brilliance, there must be chaos. Before a brilliant person begins something great, they must look foolish in the crowd.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Any small object that is accidentally dropped will hide under a larger object.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Any time things appear to be going better, you have overlooked something.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Any time you think you have influence, try ordering around someone else's dog.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Anyone who uses the phrase "easy as taking candy from a baby" has never tried taking candy from a baby.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Be an optimist -- at least until they start moving animals in pairs to Cape Kennedy.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Always remember your weapons system was made by the lowest bidder

Unknown, in War and Peace