Aphorisms Galore!

Altruism and Cynicism

173 aphorisms  ·  15 comments

Aphorisms in This Category

tiny.ag/5otyux70  ·  submitted 1997

I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: "O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous." And God granted it.

Voltaire, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/58hbs9pq  ·  submitted 1997

It's not true that nice guys finish last. Nice guys are winners before the game even starts.

Addison Walker, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/amzxlbug  ·  submitted 1997

All humans are hypocrites; the biggest hypocrite of all is the one who claims to detest hypocrisy.

Peter Wastholm, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/otpgz4zj  ·  submitted 1997

A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.

Gore Vidal, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/k8lcsqdw  ·  submitted 1997

Calvin and Hobbes (paperback)

Heck, what's a little extortion among friends?

Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/dliywafc  ·  submitted 1997

Calvin and Hobbes (paperback)

I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?

Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/t4nrvjai  ·  submitted 1997

Pooh's Little Instruction Book (hardcover)

A little consideration, a little thought for others, makes all the difference.

Joan Powers, Pooh's Little Instruction Book, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/pyitdvns  ·  submitted 1997

I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

W. C. Fields, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/u5uejalg  ·  submitted 1999

Never give a sucker an even break and never smarten up a chump.

W. C. Fields, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/vkemi9qo  ·  submitted 1997

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.

W. C. Fields, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/k40t75a9  ·  submitted 1997

No guest is so welcome in a friend's house that he will not become a nuisance after three days.

Titus Maccius Plautus, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/pjkyl6oi  ·  submitted 1997

An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you have just found out.

Will Rogers, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/ijcqpq8f  ·  submitted 1997

Do good by stealth.

Ray Prince, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/fjkyccqy  ·  submitted 1997

In this world, there is one terrible thing, and that is that everyone has his reasons.

Jean Renoir, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/lhf5xdsj  ·  submitted 1997

Beware of altruism. It is based on self-deception, the root of all evil.

Ayn Rand, (commencement speech to Naval Academy), in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/tnirgb8y  ·  submitted 1997

Conscience is the inner voice that warns us somebody is looking.

Henry Louis Mencken, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/jwmd8ebc  ·  submitted 1997

Criticism is prejudice made plausible.

Henry Louis Mencken, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/hwvmnmsf  ·  submitted 1997

I'd never join a club that would allow a person like me to become a member.

Groucho Marx, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/g7qmt4qj  ·  submitted 1997

Welcome thy neighbor into thy fallout shelter. He'll come in handy if you run out of food.

Dean McLaughlin, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/bn17or2l  ·  submitted 1997

I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.

Groucho Marx, in Altruism and Cynicism