Aphorisms Galore!

Altruism and Cynicism

173 aphorisms  ·  15 comments

Aphorisms in This Category

tiny.ag/purgb27l  ·  submitted 1997

A dozen press agents working overtime can do terrible things to the human spirit.

Cecil B. De Mille, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/1make2qd  ·  submitted 1997

The Brothers Karamazov (paperback)

Everything is permitted.

Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Brothers Karamazov, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/tacuwmyh  ·  submitted 1997

He who hesitates is probably smart... or maybe stapled to the floor.

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/v128alif  ·  submitted 1997

In the country of the blind, the one-eyed man is king... and the one-eyed man with the high heels and the feather boa is queen.

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/9xelzoym  ·  submitted 1997

Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think, and a docudrama with ugly actors for those who film docudramas.

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death

tiny.ag/p2zj718l  ·  submitted 1997

The only absolute knowledge worth attaining is that your life is meaningless. -- My life? Well now, that's another story...

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death

tiny.ag/rx3wkhug  ·  submitted 1997

You are cautious in showing your true self to others. Have you thought about plastic surgery?

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/57fvsz6t  ·  submitted 1997

No good deed goes unpunished.

Clare Boothe Luce, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/kje1nil8  ·  submitted 1997

Grub first, then ethics.

Bertolt Brecht, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/ojk8xbtj  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/vr4hxjva  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Egoist: A person of low taste, more interested in themselves than in me.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/dxvyak3f  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Eulogy: Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/dzggn7ah  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Politeness: The most acceptable hypocrisy.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/ixcdrxvs  ·  submitted 1997

The covers of this book are too far apart.

Ambrose Bierce, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/vlei56tn  ·  submitted 1997

Every age is fed on illusions, lest men should renounce life early and the human race come to an end.

Joseph Conrad, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/9einaqki  ·  submitted 1997

We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don't like?

Jean Cocteau, in Altruism and Cynicism and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/eh4xjmzt  ·  submitted 1997

Love thy neighbor as thyself, but choose your neighborhood.

Louise Beal, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/mgrteolp  ·  submitted 2011 by peter

Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

Robert J. Hanlon, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/zm6nq4mh  ·  submitted 1997

We should forgive our enemies, but only after they've been taken out and shot.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/u1yhdeyw  ·  submitted 1999

Trust everybody, but cut the cards.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism