Aphorisms Galore!

Altruism and Cynicism

173 aphorisms  ·  15 comments

Aphorisms in This Category

tiny.ag/xl1yrua8  ·  submitted 1997

George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but he also admitted doing it. Now, do you know why his father didn't punish him? Because George still had the axe in his hand.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/p7q95xlg  ·  submitted 1997

Hypocrisy is the vaseline of social intercourse.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/7gz85bqy  ·  submitted 1997

The cynics are right nine times out of ten.

Henry Louis Mencken, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/b4tuds1y  ·  submitted 1997

There's always an easy solution to every human problem -- neat, plausible, and wrong.

Henry Louis Mencken, in Altruism and Cynicism and Science and Religion

tiny.ag/xhg05ovb  ·  submitted 1997

I never know how much of what I say is true.

Bette Midler, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/1make2qd  ·  submitted 1997

The Brothers Karamazov (paperback)

Everything is permitted.

Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Brothers Karamazov, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/tacuwmyh  ·  submitted 1997

He who hesitates is probably smart... or maybe stapled to the floor.

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/v128alif  ·  submitted 1997

In the country of the blind, the one-eyed man is king... and the one-eyed man with the high heels and the feather boa is queen.

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/9xelzoym  ·  submitted 1997

Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think, and a docudrama with ugly actors for those who film docudramas.

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death

tiny.ag/p2zj718l  ·  submitted 1997

The only absolute knowledge worth attaining is that your life is meaningless. -- My life? Well now, that's another story...

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death

tiny.ag/rx3wkhug  ·  submitted 1997

You are cautious in showing your true self to others. Have you thought about plastic surgery?

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/qr9ysjed  ·  submitted 1997

Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.

Albert Einstein, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/bx0vlces  ·  submitted 1997

Man usually avoids attributing cleverness to somebody else -- unless it is an enemy.

Albert Einstein, in Altruism and Cynicism and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/l9caw6tv  ·  submitted 1997

A prig is a fellow who is always making you a present of his opinions.

George Eliot, in Altruism and Cynicism