Aphorisms Galore!

Unknown

Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist

tiny.ag/mz7zqsiw  ·  submitted 1997

There are two sides to every divorce: yours and the shithead's.

Unknown, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/ceh5zfoy  ·  submitted 1997

There are two reasons for doing something: a really good reason and the real reason.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/qkpqiaid  ·  submitted 1997

There are two kinds of people: those who work and those who take the credit. It's better to belong to the first group because there is less competition.

Unknown, (Wilson on Home Improvement), in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/mnjs1wvi  ·  submitted 1997

There are people who make things happen, those who watch what happens, and those who wonder what happened.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/qzqzxjwo  ·  submitted 1997

There are no errors in this book, except this one.

Unknown, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/yevckcm5  ·  submitted 1997

There are a lot of ways to become a failure, but never taking a chance is the most successful.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/w4srf1nw  ·  submitted 1997

The world is governed more by appearance than realities, so it is fully as necessary to seem to know something as it is to know it.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/d0mk6ixb  ·  submitted 1997

The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/juykxd68  ·  submitted 1997

The tallest blade of grass is the first to be cut by the scythe.

Unknown, (Russian proverb), in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/eoiuzgcy  ·  submitted 1997

The surest way of having something done is to forbid your kids to do it.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/nbrpkw6o  ·  submitted 1997

The surest sign that a man is in love is when he divorces his wife.

Unknown, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/kvmrkdxc  ·  submitted 1997

The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.

Unknown, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/f1l2esy8  ·  submitted 1997

Theft from a single author is plagiarism. Theft from two is comparative study. Theft from three or more is research.

Unknown, in Science and Religion and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/xhom8dbn  ·  submitted 1997

Only those who do not expect anything are never disappointed. Only those who never try, never fail.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/0arre1jp  ·  submitted 1997

People who have no faults are terrible; there is no way of taking advantage of them.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/vykjqus7  ·  submitted 1997

Join the Army: travel to exotic distant lands, meet exciting, unusual people and kill them.

Unknown, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/nsh95i8e  ·  submitted 1997

People who claim they don't let little things bother them have never slept in a room with a single mosquito.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/bmuf1k6g  ·  submitted 1997

People do not resist change -- they resist being changed.

Unknown, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/vdvrew4w  ·  submitted 1997

Pardo's First Postulate: Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/me4bnv2q  ·  submitted 1997

Ogden's Law: The sooner you fall behind, the more time you have to catch up.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation