Unknown

You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You draw nothing out of the bank of life except what you deposit in it.

Unknown, in Life and Death

You may only have two of the three choices: (1) Enjoy your job. (2)Work within the law. (3)Make lots of money.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

You should emulate your heroes, but don't carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You're a genius if you fly a kite during a thunderstorm, and discover that lightning is electricity -- but you're an idiot if you fly a kite during a thunderstorm, and discover that lightning can kill you.

Unknown, (from Mad Magazine), in Success and Failure

Always remember your weapons system was made by the lowest bidder

Unknown, in War and Peace

You cannot produce a baby in one month by impregnating nine women.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Never deprive someone of hope -- it may be all they have.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

War is menstruation envy.

Unknown, in War and Peace

Never give advice -- a wise man won't need it, a fool won't heed it.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Never make anything simple and efficient when a way can be found to make it complex and wonderful.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid all together.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

Ninety-Ninety Rule of Project Schedules: The first ninety percent of the task takes ninety percent of the time, and the last ten percent takes the other ninety percent.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

No one gets too old to learn a new way of being stupid.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, volume, humidity, and other variables, the organism will do as it damn well pleases.

Unknown, in Science and Religion

Marriage is not a word -- it is a sentence.

Unknown, in Love and Hate

Voters are people who have the God-given right to decide who will waste their money for them.

Unknown, (from Politicians and Other Scoundrels by Ferdinand Lundberg), in Law and Politics

Use soft words and hard arguments.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wisdom and Ignorance

Non-Reciprocal Laws of Expectations: Negative expectations yield negative results. Positive expectations yield negative results.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Not everyone born in a stable thinks himself a horse.

Unknown, in Life and Death