Aphorisms Galore!

Men and Women

52 aphorisms  ·  11 comments

Aphorisms in This Category

tiny.ag/d6nssfxi  ·  submitted 1997

Large increases in cost with questionable increases in performance can be tolerated only in race horses and women.

Lord Kelvin, in Men and Women and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/tcrvsd4o  ·  submitted 1997

Women first want to find out what is in your wallet, and second what is in your pants.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/ymbukbew  ·  submitted 1997

When a man's wife learns to understand him, she usually stops listening to him.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/wrcm1vhx  ·  submitted 1997

The more I know men, the more I love my dog.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/n51jrfp4  ·  submitted 1997

When a female has tears in her eyes the one who cannot see is the male.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/dccyeyhv  ·  submitted 1997

A man is as good as he has to be, and a woman is as bad as she dares.

Elbert Hubbard, in Men and Women and Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/rxe07t5e  ·  submitted 1997

Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand.

Benny Hill, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/hf3tbwd4  ·  submitted 1997

My notion of a wife at forty is that a man should be able to change her, like a bank note, for two twenties.

Douglas Jerrold, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/1txkpoby  ·  submitted 1997

Were there no women, men might live like gods.

Thomas Dekker, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/1nyf2coi  ·  submitted 1997

While farmers generally allow one rooster for ten hens, ten men are scarcely sufficient to service one woman.

Giovanni Boccaccio, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/4gnwlaf8  ·  submitted 1997

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.

Alexandre Dumas, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/3mx96pc7  ·  submitted 1997

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.

Walt Disney, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/tr9cqzsg  ·  submitted 1997

Sex is what women have and men want.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/u0wakq2d  ·  submitted 1997

Nature has given women so much power that the law has very wisely given them little.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/c8lfkzap  ·  submitted 1997

My wife says I never listen to her. At least I think that's what she says.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/i3egysnq  ·  submitted 1997

Men who cherish for women the highest respect are seldom popular with them.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/ba1k2myj  ·  submitted 1999 by Falcon

Men don't need women -- they just need certain parts of their anatomy.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/xxgha1bk  ·  submitted 1997

Men like to pursue an elusive woman like a cake of wet soap -- even men who hate baths.

Gelett Burgess, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/osjwdfeg  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Beauty: That power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Life and Death and Men and Women

tiny.ag/exb7lihg  ·  submitted 1997

I've had one child. My husband wants to have another. I'd like to watch him have another.

Unknown, in Men and Women