Success and Failure

You cannot produce a baby in one month by impregnating nine women.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You cannot achieve the impossible without attempting the absurd.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You can't carve your way to success without cutting remarks.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You are not what you think you are, you are not what they think you are, but you could be what you think they think you are.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

While anyone can admit to themselves they were wrong, the true test is admission to someone else.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Try to get all of your posthumous medals in advance.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Success and Failure

Laugh at your problems; everybody else does.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Johnson's First Law: When any mechanical contrivance fails, it will do so at the most inconvenient possible time.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Jones' Law: The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Jenkinson's Law: It won't work.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

It is said that the lonely eagle flies to the mountain peaks while the lowly ant crawls the ground, but cannot the soul of the ant soar as high as the eagle?

Unknown, in Success and Failure

It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Vice and Virtue

It is always better to fail in doing something than to excel in doing nothing.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation

It is a mistake to allow any mechanical object to realize you are in a hurry.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Imbesi's Law with Freeman's Extension: In order for something to become clean, something else must become dirty; but you can get everything dirty without getting anything clean.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

If you see a turtle on a fence post, he has had some help.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

I'd rather be rich than stupid.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wealth and Poverty

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Unknown, in Success and Failure