Aphorisms Galore!

Front Page

Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/dnj7czjw  ·  submitted 1998

Mankind must give up war in the Atomic Era. What is at stake is the life or death of humanity.

Albert Einstein, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/losztnwc  ·  submitted 1997

Imagination is more important than knowledge.

Albert Einstein, in Science and Religion and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/zpsqkb73  ·  submitted 1997

The more you wrestle with a turd, the more shit gets on you.

Shelly Horton, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/o5og0ube  ·  submitted 1997

A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat what you watch.

Hermione Gingold, in Food and Drink

tiny.ag/xachd7wx  ·  submitted 1997

Whenever anyone says anything he is indulging in theories.

Alfred Korzybski, in Science and Religion and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/x2tnoops  ·  submitted 1997

The Puritans hated bear-baiting, not because it gave pain to the bear, but because it gave pleasure to the spectators.

Thomas Macaulay, History of England, I, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/9whxy8s7  ·  submitted 1997

Life is not lost by dying; life is lost minute by minute, day by dragging day, in all the thousand small uncaring ways.

Stephen Vincent Benét, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/8vmi9s0a  ·  submitted 1997

I call Christianity the one great curse, the one great intrinsic depravity, the one great instinct for revenge for which no expedient is sufficiently poisonous, secret, subterranean, petty -- I call it the one mortal blemish of mankind.

Friedrich Nietzsche, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/rxe07t5e  ·  submitted 1997

Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand.

Benny Hill, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/ig3zfjp4  ·  submitted 1997

The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.

Winston Churchill, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/nqhblasx  ·  submitted 1997

It is perfectly true that the government is best which governs least. It is equally true that the government is best which provides most.

Walter Lippmann, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/nxwvhtlg  ·  submitted 1997

Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.

Timothy Leary, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/tymlwb79  ·  submitted 1997

For a man to achieve all that is demanded of him, he must regard himself as greater than he is.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, in Vice and Virtue and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/6y7nwgkt  ·  submitted 1999 by Brian J. Dent

Too much of a good thing is just that.

Brian J. Dent, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/bgvxtarp  ·  submitted 1997

I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.

Thomas Jefferson, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/pbhm4rie  ·  submitted 1997

Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them.

Samuel Butler, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/cz34szjm  ·  submitted 1997

My sources are unreliable, but their information is fascinating.

Ashleigh Brilliant, Brilliant Thoughts (copyright info: www.ashleighbrilliant.com), in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/i5ba47dl  ·  submitted 1997

It gets late early out there.

Yogi Berra, (on Yankee Stadium in the fall), in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/d3ttj2ag  ·  submitted 1997

You can lead a boy to college, but you cannot make him think.

Elbert Hubbard, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/zzbstsyk  ·  submitted 1997

If the aborigine drafted an I.Q. test, all of Western civilization would presumably flunk it.

Stanley Garn, in Wisdom and Ignorance